The G Manifesto

Watch for the Hook, and Don’t forget to Duck

“The C stands for Cool Breeze who’s known as the champ
Freddy Calhoun, the coolest cutta at camp
Ay, my one’s and my two’s got your whole town shook
You betta listen to your corner, and watch for the hook
You betta listen to your corner, and watch for the hook
You betta listen to your corner, and watch for the hook!”

—–Select lyrics from “Watch For The Hook” by Cool Breeze (G Manifesto Certified underground ATL classic)

So I am sure you all heard about the city of Chicago banning the sale of the delicacy Foie Gras. Here is yet another example of government intrusion on our personal lives. I really think we need to get our priorities straight. I mean seriously, don’t we have bigger problems than Goose and Duck liver? And of all places, banning it in Chicago. Here is a city were we have poverty, violence and drug problems. Mayor Daley was the only voice of reason and said “We have children getting killed by gang leaders and dope dealers. We have real issues here in this city. And we’re dealing with Foie Gras?”

First of all, I can’t believe Mayor Daley couldn’t squash this nonsense. I can’t remember a time when a Mayor of Chicago with the last name Daley didn’t have the spot on lock. This obviously isn’t our father’s Chicago. I really miss Irish Democratic Machine Politics.

Second of all, what is the reason for banning Foie Gras? Radicals say that the “overfeeding of ducks” to make Foie Gras is inhumane. Isn’t the “underfeeding of humans” inhumane as well? Seriously, we have children growing up around the world and in our country malnourished and starving, and we are worried about giving ducks too much to eat? Its not like ducks are endangered. It’s not like it’s the Sturgeon from the Caspian Sea that might go extinct. Why don’t these people go to any park in any city that has a pond, all you will see is ducks. And who knows if the ducks don’t like being overfed. Has anyone asked the ducks if they don’t like it? It has to be better than being a hungry duck, right? I haven’t noticed Daffy or Donald taking a public stand against Foie Gras. Personally, I like overeating. Many times I like overeating Foie Gras! And smoking cigarettes and gulping wine with a Bulgarian Model Girl, while Zegna down. In fact, there are few things I like more. Have any of these people who are so against Foie Gras actually tried it? I doubt it, because the stuff is delicious!

I really cannot relate to the minds of these people who are against Foie Gras. How can this be their top priority? Think bout it. If you were so in favor of ducks rights, wouldn’t you also be against violations on human rights? Anti-war perhaps? Everyday Americans die in the Middle East, but you want to spend your energy stopping the sale of Foie Gras? What is next? Stopping the sale of Live Lobster Sashimi? Personally, I like seeing a Live Lobster look at me while I am eating it. Are you gonna try to take away that pleasure as well? Why not go after factory farming of pigs and chickens. Factory farming does more harm to animals, people, and the environment that Foie Gras does. Why don’t they go after Pizza Hut for cheapening Italian Culture and serving fake cheese? That stuff cannot be good for anyone. Charlie Trotter (who first came out against Foie Gras) really screwed this one up. One of my good friends who lives in Chicago, (who is G certified, armored car heists are his specialty) wanted to shove this Trotter guy in an oven, when he heard that even Trotter said the government shouldn’t decide for people. (You don’t know how close you came Trotter………..)

Side Note:

If you have been hanging around boxing gyms since Oscar De La Hoya dismantled Ricardo Mayorga, you have probably heard the rumors that De La Hoya and I might meet in the ring. True, if this fight happens, it would set a record for the most girls ever attending a boxing match. And true, I haven’t been in a ring since the amateur days and some unlicensed bare-knuckle boxing matches in the mid 90’s in London (when I was working with some Firms on the East End), but I can tell you De La hasn’t faced anyone with my body attack. You remember when my main man Hopkins took out De La with a liver punch right? Where do you think he got that tip? But the fight will probably never happen. I don’t think De La would want to fight above 160lbs, and I am not dropping below 168….I enjoy Foie Gras too much……..The Rest is Up to You………..

Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
The Guide to Getting More out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com

(Want to see something in The G Manifesto? Send suggestions to thegmanifesto@yahoo.com)

JR Writer version, Watch for the Hook

Cool Breeze, Watch for the Hook!!!!!