The G Manifesto

Grad on Voicemail Gangsters

Grad is a contributer to the G Manifesto on Side Hustles: The Art of Enhancing BankRoll, Why we do what we do? and Why It Pays to Be A First Mover.

Here is his take on Death Threats and Voice Mail Gangsters:

Michael,

How are you? I hope the summer is producing many knock-outs…
Unfortunately, Ive been on the grind and haven’t much time to tour the scenes. I just read your recent post regarding Voice Mail Gangsters and Text Message Bullies.
I must say your break down is extremely on point so with that I say, Kudos to you.

However you left out some key points, one of which is my personal favorite…
The “I know where you live” line that some brokester raps to me…
I always chuckle when I hear that one since more often than not,
I don’t know where I’m going to be next week… So unless they have some sixth sense they purchased at Pacific Sunwear, it holds no weight.
Its also comical because by the time they take the greyhound or cash in their credit card miles to find me, I’m gone.

The other consideration is that these guys are chumps. Instead of getting angry at the real culprit (their girlfriend), they get mad at us and leave bottomless threats. If they actually sat down to think about it, they’d realize, it’s the girls fault, not ours. Perhaps they were doing something wrong and left the girl with no choice but to cheat. But then again, maybe its their fault too.

There is one recent story that comes to mind regarding these faux gangsters…

I was entertaining some guests in town at the Hudson Hotel. While sitting at our table, suited down in a Kiton, three button grey chalk stripe bespoke number with a lavender Brioni shirt blown open, I was approached by two spikey haired dudes with barb wire tattoos. I had noticed these guys online outside when I walked in but now they seemed obviously more drunk. I suppose to they needed to fill up on liquid courage to approach me.

But that’s neither Peter Lugar or Sturm, Ruger.

Anyway, the more brazen of the two, said, “yo bro, were you hitting on my girl last week?” Of course, I looked puzzled and embarrassed, One because I try to avoid Papa Roach and his compadres and Two because I sincerely didn’t know who he was talking about. Smoothly and politely, I replied “I don’t know, which one is she?” and that’s when he got a bit enraged. This was obviously more embarrassing for me because he’s just going to make a scene. If I was in real trouble, I probably would not have seen them coming.

As Brokester 1 was talking I could feel one of my guests stand and I quickly around turned to quell the situation. As I turned back around to see Brokester 2 chime in, I interrupted him with a simple question… “Why is it my fault if your girlfriend plays you? She played you, not me… I’ve never been played before but if so, I highly doubt I’d approach you to talk about it” The question clearly struck him off guard as I could see thoughts of mediocrity inundate and paralyzed him. Images of overdrafted bank statements, cute face but overweight girls, sale items at Hollister and trophy chests with only JV letters ricocheted off his mind’s eye and piled together in one big sub-par lump. At that point he had no choice but to walk away, ashamed. While walking away, his friend turned around to say “youre lucky” but I smirked, luck has nothing to do with this equation.

To Health & Wealth

~ Grad

Mobb Deep – Shook Ones Pt. II

Rakim – Guess Who’s Back