A team of Heist Men have heisted more than $7 million in Jewelry, antiques, antiquities, rare books and CASH from some of Los Angeles’s wealthiest hoods. They have been targeting homes of celebrities, sports stars, corporate magnates and moguls.
These guys are obviously pros from the old school as they haven’t left hardly any clues behind, although on one job in Encino they were caught on video (you always have to disarm the video cameras). Keep in mind, $7 million sounds like a lot but they still have to pay out tipsters, fences, and kick money upstairs as well. Let’s hope they give back to the poor as well, Robin Hood style. (I have always thought of myself as a modern day Robin Hood, except I don’t wear those goofy tights and pointy shoes…I strictly rock bespoke Italian suits and hand made English custom shoes)
I can’t think of too many people who will shed a tear for the rich and famous that have been heisted for some of their trinkets or their insurance companies who will ultimately be stuck. Maybe it wasn’t such a good idea to feature your house on MTV cribs…Skippy….The Rest is Up to You…
Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA Your favorite International Playboy on the Rise’s favorite International Playboy on the Rise
AKA I can’t leave the Streets alone, The Game needs Me
The Guide to Getting More out of Life http://www.thegmanifesto.com
(Want to see something in The G Manifesto? Send suggestions to thegmanifesto@yahoo.com)
Papoose, Love is a BattlefieldNas featuring Amerie, Rule
I can’t front. There was a time when I liked Bottle Service in Nightclubs. I still remember the first time I experienced Bottle Service. It was about 12 years ago in a very high-end nightclub in Tijuana, Mexico when I was associating with some of the Arellano-Felix crew based out of TJ. The advantages were obvious: beautiful girls came up to your table (in this case upper class fly Mexican girls, which I do have a thing for), you had a place to relax, re-group, and everyone thought you were balling out of control. (For the record, I never did anything illegal with the Arellano-Felix cartel, but I do remember having a Magical Night that night…chicas were sweating me like condensation in a steam room, which was really no different than a night for me without Bottle Service.)
Fast forward to 2007, and Bottle Service has become the standard (and I don’t mean that overrated Andre Balazs hotel in Los Angeles either) for most high-end clubs all across the bubble. It has been popular in Miami and NYC for at least ten years, but my sources tell me it is currently popular in many C-grade cities and they even offer it in many D-grade cities as well. The advantages are still there, primarily, Bottle Service allows a group of Investment Bankers, Hedge fund guys, commercial real estate jerkoffs, or any type of weesh 9 to 5 guys the ability to enter a club with out too much hassle. But there are many problems that Bottle Service brings to nightclubs in general and nightlife in particular. There are also a few more reasons why I am not a big fan of Bottle Service.
Camp Lo, Dj Honda, Disco Tec
The Crowd Bottle Service Brings
In the 2000’s we have seen a corporatization of nightclubs. Now when you go to a nighclub everyone is some kind of corporate jerkoff. Interesting people are no longer found in Nightclubs. The artists, writers, intellectuals, underground DJ’s etc have been effectively priced out of the nightclub with bottle service. The only people that can afford it are the Investment bankers, real estate types, and Celebs (and of course, underworld figures). That is why when you walk into a club you see so many striped shirts that you think you are seeing some kind of 3-D optical illusion. The funny thing is that these are the type of guys who would have never gotten into a club in the old days (nights) when you were picked out because of how you looked, dressed, if you had connections, or by reputation. So today, clubs are full of people that normally would have been standing in line in nights gone by.
Juelz Santana and Lil Wayne, Blow
Too common place
The whole purpose of Bottle Service is that it separates you from the masses. But today, there are clubs with 40 tables of bottle service. All it has done is raised the bar on what is the norm. Every fool with a platinum card can buy exclusivity. What is so exclusive about that?
Wale, I ain’t sprung…lyrics
Stuck it the same spot
I really don’t like Bottle service because I like to be agile when I go out. If a nightclub sucks for whatever reason, I don’t want to be tied down to some table with a three bottle minimum. I like to stick and move (so to speak).
Camp Lo, Lucini
Don’t realize how expensive it is
For me, where CASH is no object, this is a non-issue. But for everyday regular guy out there this can be a major problem. When you get a table at a nightclub, you think “OK, two bottle minimum, bottles start at $200, there are four of us…that’s only $100 each!” Wrong equation. Once you get there you realize that the Smirnov is $200 but the Goose is $350-400 per bottle. You have to get the Goose, or it defeats the whole purpose of getting the table in the first place. Then you have to pay for the overpriced mixers. Then the table of the guys with the professional Athlete next to you has just ordered two bottles of Cristal, and the Girls that were hanging out with you are slowly shimming their way over to their table. So you need to counter attack and get two bottles of Crist to keep pace. Keep in mind at the end of the night you have to tip the Vip Waitress in the corset that brought you everything. And you can’t be cheap now, because all night you have been hitting on her with your “big balling” paper thin game and she gave you her number (you don’t realize yet, skippy, but it was a fake). Pretty soon your $400 night is $2700. Good for the club, bad for the chumpy patron.
This is when things get interesting. Let’s say you rolled in with 5 guys and got a table. Without fail, at least two guys are going to come up real short. Or they can’t be found when its time to settle up the bill.
These weak crews also always have one guy that just brings over other guys to the table. These other guys also probably won’t have a problem ordering 15 Patron shots on your tab as well as doing heavy pours off your Goose bottle. Like clockwork, once some Platinum Diggers, Nightlife Princesses, or Table Hawks finally do make it to your table, the 2nd Goose bottle will run out. That’s when some guy, (usually one who has no cash when the bill comes or says “where is the ATM in the club?” and usually reports back “the ATM is broken, I will get you next week, you know I am good for it”) will order up two more Goose bottles without hesitation. This guy also usually has a tendency to disappear when the bill comes.
Don’t be the card holder
If you do make the mistake of getting Bottle Service, you never want to be the card holder in a Bottle Service situation. This puts the burden of responsibility on you. You Will get stuck at the end of the night. Remember you and your “Fly Crew” can’t pull out 5 credit cards and split the bill up 5 ways…remember the whole goal was to look like you were flush with CASH.
Friendships Broken
More friendships have been broken over Bottle Service. Everyone involved thinks they were “done wrong” by someone in the crew. Angry, acusatory emails usually follow then following Monday: “You and your boy drank off our bottles all night and didn’t even offer any cash”, “Remember you said you would split the bill with us?” “Why do you go out if you don’t have any money?” etc.
Final thoughts
Never get bottle service. But if you do, don’t be the card holder. Don’t get it with a weak crew. Avoid other peoples tables as well, even if you don’t have a single drink off their bottles, they will think you did and try to hit you up for $500 the next week. The only time I will do it is if I am taking some people I care about and just pay CASH for the whole thing.
I can’t help but laugh every time I see a table of Real Estate or Investment guys dressed in striped shirts, gay t-shirts with writing on them, designer jeans, at the end of the night, their bottles nearing empty, no girls, trying in vain to salvage their night with some weird dance moves. But there is no saving them. It’s like when you stab someone in the jugular with a big serrated knife and you twist. The ambulance might be on its way, but it’s too late…you are losing too much blood…you fade out…The Rest is Up to You…
Tonight I am going to a nightclub with Bottle Service (a necessary thing for Heist men looking for tips). I am meeting two of my best childhood friends in town who are young up and coming guns with the Mossad. I am paying…CASH.
Don’t be weesh. Sign up The G Manifesto Newsletter!
Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA Your favorite International Playboy on the Rise’s favorite International Playboy on the Rise
AKA I can’t leave the Streets alone, The Game needs Me
The Guide to Getting More out of Life http://www.thegmanifesto.com
(Want to see something in The G Manifesto? Send suggestions to thegmanifesto@yahoo.com)
Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA The Seventh Letter
AKA I can’t leave the Streets alone, The Game needs Me
The Guide to Getting More out of Life http://www.thegmanifesto.com
(Want to see something in The G Manifesto? Send suggestions to thegmanifesto@yahoo.com)
Two of boxing’s greatest practitioners will toe the line on July 21st, Bernard “The Executioner” Hopkins and Ronald “Winky” Wright. This fight does not necessarily shape up to be the most exciting fight, but should be a real tactical war. Both fighters should be hungry and after one more significant win.
Bernard Hopkins is a future Hall of Famer and defended his middleweight title 20 straight times. I have rolled in his Entourage plenty of times and I know he is a very hungry and is as intense as they come (If you watch tapes of Hopkins fights from the late 90’s its easy to pick me out in his Entourage; I am the handsome, young, sharp dressed guy, usually Versace or Armani’d down, also the only guy who is not African American). Hopkins is a tough customer that can almost always find a way to win with his rough and tumble style. He is a defensive master who has patience to wait for an opening then strikes. His boxing style is a lot like my Game.
Hopkins has power, but has usually knocked out opponents by grinding them down. He should be physically stronger than Wright, but I think his mental strength is what is going to give him an edge.
Winky Wright is a defensive master with a venomous jab. He keeps his hands very high, but is also adept at slipping punches. He has two big wins over Sugar Shane Mosley, a dominant victory over Felix “Tito” Trinidad, and a good win over Ike “Bazooka” Quartey. With his airtight defense he has looked very dominant over otherwise great fighters.
The Prediction
Although Hopkins final days have to be soon (he is 42 years old), I think he has one more great performance left. If there is anyone out there that can solve the puzzle that is Winky Wright it is Hopkins. He is really going to have to be aggressive, but willing to exchange, and rough up Winky. On the flip side, Winky might dominate Hopkins. But I think Hopkins win over Antonio Tarver proves that he still has plenty left. I see Hopkins taking a hard fought decision. That is of course if the judges see it that way. The Rest is Up to You………
Side Note:
Let’s hope Arturo Gatti stays retired. The only category that Gatti beat Alfonso Gomez in was “better hair” during their fight last Saturday. Having “better hair” is important for a Playboy out on the town, but in a boxing ring it doesn’t matter too much. However, Gatti was swooping a pretty fly girl after the fight so the night wasn’t a total loss…
Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA The Seventh Letter
AKA I can’t leave the Streets alone, The Game needs Me
The Guide to Getting More out of Life http://www.thegmanifesto.com
(Want to see something in The G Manifesto? Send suggestions to thegmanifesto@yahoo.com)
On the evening of July 14th in Atlantic City, we might have the Fight of The Year when two boxers/playboys, Arturo “Thunder” Gatti and Alfonso Gomez square off. Alfonso Gomez is best known for “The Contender” series (the only reality show I really watch, save America’s Next Top Model, which I only watch because I have swooped on a bunch of the girls that have been on that Show), where he proved himself to be an action packed fighter with plenty of heart. Unless you have lived under a rock for the last 16 years, you know Arturo Gatti as the most action packed fighter with the most heart of our generation. Hell, he has been involved in four of Ring Magazine’s Fights of the Year, and has at least a dozen more that could easily have taken those honors. The big questions for this fight are: How much does Gatti have left? And, Is Gomez the real deal? We will find out on July 14th in a fight that is all but guaranteed to be dope.
An interesting side not is that Mickey Ward will be working Gatti’s corner. You know Mickey Ward, the guy that went to the best war of the 2000’s (the war in Iraq being the worst war of the 2000’s) in a trilogy with Gatti. It will be interesting to see if Ward will be a plus in his corner. He will get Gatti in shape, no doubt, but will he tell Gatti to box and jab and not war? But I truly believe that having Ward as a motivator for Gatti will help. Gomez is for sure the hungrier fighter.
Good Gatti Video
Everyone loves a warrior. And throughout his whole career, Arturo has been The quintessential warrior. Gomez appears to be the heir apparent. We will see on June 14th. Let’s break it down:
Big edge to Gatti. His left hook to the body is the thing nightmares are made of. (Which is weird because my Game is the thing that gives nightmares to rival players.) Gomez can punch, but hasn’t shown the kind of one punch power that Gatti can.
LL Cool J, Mamma Said Knock You Out
Physical Attributes
I have sparred with Gatti and he is a monster, but Gomez is the Natural welterweight. This could be dangerous for Gatti, since Gomez is somewhat like Carlos Baldomir in this respect.
Gatti VS Ward
Hand Speed
This is an interesting one. Gatti would appear to have the faster hands, but if Gomez can rough up Gatti, we could see him slow down considerably.
Good Gatti Video
Footwork
Same as hand speed. Gatti would appear to have the edge, but in the middle rounds when this fight show turn into an all out war, this could be even.
Defense
Gomez is no Pernell Whitaker or Winky Wright, but Gatti’s defense is like regular guy’s Game in a Nightclub: Full of holes.
Gatti is as durable as a VVS diamond. But he cuts if you breathe on him too heavy. He cuts easier than window glass of a socialite’s mansion that you are heisting. Gomez has proven to be mighty durable against the competition he has faced so far. Keep in mind though; the competition Gomez has faced couldn’t lace up the gloves of the competition Gatti has faced.
LL Cool J ft. Keith Murray, Fat Joe & Foxy Brown- I Shot Ya (G Manifesto Certified Track)
Heart
Not to take anything away from Gomez, but nobody can be Gatti in this category (save your humble author). If the chips are down, Gatti only becomes more dangerous. A coward dies a thousand deaths and a warrior dies just one. If Gatti loses, best believe he will be carried out on his shield.
Gatti come from behind win
Killer instinct
Gatti. If Gatti has got you, then he has got you. He can kill you fast, he can kill you slow, and he isn’t afraid to put a tag on your toe.
Endurance
Gomez being the younger man, should have a slight edge here.
Ring Generalship
Gatti has been in more wars than Alexander the Great. He knows his way around the ring. Sometimes, when he gets into trouble, however he forgets to clinch. This can get him into serious trouble. But keep in mind, this is why people love Gatti so much, he is a flawed warrior (unlike why people like me so much, I my Game has zero flaws, but I still remain The Peoples Champ).
This fight will come down to heart as I see it. And I would love to see Gatti pull off one more miracle. But the good news is, if Gatti does lose, we will have another warrior to take his place. Alfonso Gomez.
No disrespect to Gomez, but I will be strongly in Gatti’s corner come July 14th. As far as the smart money? I am placing my bet right before the fight (I still have to assimilate some data). But you can bet that you will hear about who I picked after the fight. The Rest is Up to You……….
“Mason delivers like Holyfield in the 9th once again. I learned from underground sources of your “lock down” on the gentlemen’s clubs in NYC, NO, LA, Vegas and Miami for some time now, and it is a work of art to say the least. What is your policy on being strapped in a club? Grinder and shakers could feel the piece, so to speak. Word on the street is your order take out from the finest restaurants in town to your booth and you hand feed the meat performers the finest pâté, caviar and escargot money can buy? I tend to think you leave out key elements in your manifesto’s out of fear a up and coming top G like myself may dissect key ingredients to your finest dishes?
In any event, exotics are exotics, much like a zoo exhibit and I even heisted a few in my day just for fun, making out with hard cash, soiled panties and even one exotics rollie. I know it sounds cruel, but a G is a G, and we do what we do best! A toast to you Mason on another hard hitting manifesto.”
Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA The Seventh Letter
AKA I can’t leave the Streets alone, The Game needs Me
The Guide to Getting More out of Life http://www.thegmanifesto.com
(Want to see something in The G Manifesto? Send suggestions to thegmanifesto@yahoo.com)
Side note:
The Fernando Vargas VS Ricardo Mayorga could also be the Fight of the Year. Good press conference. Good Business. Machismo.
LL Cool J, Rock The Bells (G Manifesto Certified Track)
