Two Picasso Paintings, worth at minimum of $67 million, were swiped from Picasso’s granddaughter’s house in Paris. The two paintings were, “Maya and the Doll” and “Portrait of Jacqueline”. They disappeared from the dope 7th arrondissement, or district of Paris from the home of Diana Widmaier-Picasso.
The number of missing Picasso’s stands at about 444 missing paintings. The reason is because Picasso paintings are so fly, “Maya and the Doll” is one of my personal favorites. The thieves, or thief, now just have to deal with moving the product. Hopefully, for his sake he already had a buyer……
Famous Paintings like these very rarely fetch a good price unless you have good connections in Asia like I do. Still, not bad for a days work.
Many Players these days think they are kicking ass when the swoop two girls at once. The French call it a Ménage à Trios. News just in…..swooping two girls at once is as passé as Multi-colored striped button down “Gaslamp” shirts. The New-School is all about swooping three girls at once. The French call it a Ménage à Quatre and The G calls it The Trio. Impossible? It is for the feeble minded and those lacking imagination. But for The G, nothing is impossible. Here is how it is done:
Location
You need to put yourself in the right place. A sports bar with 80% Guy is not the right place. Gentleman’s Clubs are fertile ground for pulling off The Trio. Certain Cities are better than others as well. South Beach, Miami, and Las Vegas are better than Cincinnati, Ohio or Omaha, Nebraska for The Trio. (No offense to Cincinnati or Omaha, I have never been, but I am pretty sure both places suck).
Dress Flash
I have certain suits that I always swoop three girls at once in. If I had to re-buy these suits I would certainly have paid double. I really like wearing a Grey Two-button Dior Homme (Made in Italy) with Ketchup/Bloodlust Pinstripes (and I don’t mean my nightly bloodlust that is spilling over into my days either) with Elmo Red interior, Roadrunner Blue Canali shirt, and Count Chocula Brown Gucci Loafers.
Flash CASH
You need to carry a Big Bankroll if you want to swoop Three Girls at once. Ever see a poor guy leave a Nightclub with Three Girls?
Zero in on The Right Girls
Contrary to popular average Guy opinion, the three “decent” Bottle Blond white girls doing Patron shots, yelling, wearing jeans, doing the awkward “white girl dance” in a Southern California Nightclub are not the best prospects for a Trio. I have done an Un-official Case Study and the more beautiful the girls the better The Trio Prospect. Models are great Prospects. So are Exotic Dancers. 9 to 5 girls trying to “cut loose” are not. Which is fortunate since I prefer Model girls and Exotic Dancers to Civilian Girls. Doesn’t life work out perfect sometimes?
Trade on Reputation
The G trades on reputation. In the case of The Trio, Sexual Reputation with a girl can be you greatest asset. If one girl already knows you can regulate, it makes it that much easier to convince the other two. Many of my Trio’s have been instigated by a Girl I have rolled with before. If you have a good Trio girl on your team, many times you can sit back and smoke Parliament Ultra-lights while the girl on your team does all the set up work. Now that’s Gangster like Shyne.
Beans, Beeks, and Champagne
You need some sort of Spark to really light the fuse to The Trio. The G Manifesto does not advocate Drug use, but Beans and Beeks are known to work. I prefer Champagne. More Artistic. More Style Points.
Side Note:
My Cousin (a true G, sharp dresser, Latin Blood, prefers Gucci Suits, always Packs heaters, currently he is opening a Nightclub in Punta del Este) has always been a true innovator. He is very forward thinking and almost always swoops 4 or 5 girls at a time. Many times he swoops 6 girls at a time. You are really only limited by your imagination to pull it off….The Rest is Up to You………..
I love this place. In fact, I’ll say it again, I love this place. Just as the Delano is ground zero for me in SouthBeach, Miami, The Ritz is ground zero for me in New Orleans. The location on Canal Street keeps you out of Bourbon Street noise but close enough to go to Bourbon to swoop girls back to your hotel. Even though, I always stay at the Ritz, I make sure I spend plenty of money around town to help the people. That’s one reason people call me “The Peoples Champ”. What you know about Hollygrove? What you know about the 9th Ward? What you know about The Second Line? I continue to give money and support the city I love.
Atmosphere:
Class. Pure Class. This place is low-pro style. My kind of style. Heavyweights stay here. When you’re here you really feel like you are in a Big Easy Paradise. Beautiful décor, tons of flowers everywhere. Some Celebs, maybe the Lakers Basketball Team, perhaps the Late, great Johnnie Cochran or other Peoples Champs. Having a Pre-Castro Cuban Cigar in the Courtyard is the definition of Relaxation…look it up in the dictionary.
Rooms:
The Rooms in The Ritz are smaller than most modern hotels. Certainly, they are smaller than the rooms in the hotels in Vegas. But really doesn’t matter when its 4 am and you just got back to your room with a couple of Cajun Cuties, hotter than Paul Prudhomme’s kitchen at K-Pauls, just off work carrying Big Bags. I never mind helping girls carry their Big Bags back to the Ritz. Hell, I have carried more Big Bags than a Colombian Coke Smuggler. The Presidential suite is very impressive, plenty of space and is how I typically like to operate.
Competition:
Sure there are Heavyweights here, but there is a certain feeling of Community at the Ritz,….like you have Arrived. But, I have never shied away from good competition. If you want to be a Heavyweight Champ, you have to beat Heavyweights, Right? Be a Roy Jones, Jr. That being said I have beaten more NBA Legends than Isaiah Thomas. Plus, I always pack a Desert Eagle from the moment I leave the airport in The Crescent City. So I never really sweat it.
Features:
The Lobby Bar(also known as On Trois…a lot of people don’t know that): Hands down the best lobby bar in the country in your humble authors opinion. Cool as a fan. I am not alone in thinking this. I love it so much that I have been there with a fly Bayou Princess, and I have wanted to stay in the Lobby Bar for one more Goose Soda Lime instead of Dipping back to my room with her. The Spa is insane. The Restaurant is very good. I usually get the Rick Fox burger. But there are so many dope restaurants in New Orleans that you really only should go if you don’t want to leave the hotel.
The G Manifesto Move:
Lock the entire Place Down. Like New JackCity. Get the Bellhops, The Lounge Singers, the bartenders, even the girl who whips up the Bannanas Foster on your team. The Service in the Ritz is some of the best in the country and if you take care of the People here they will take care of you Ten fold…….I love this place.
Michael Porfirio Mason AKA The Peoples Champ AKA Your Favorite International Playboy’s Favorite International Playboy
AKA Your Favorite G’s Favorite G
The Guide to Getting More Out of Travel http://www.thegmanifesto.com
Millionaire Deviled Eggs at Social Miami, I am thinking, With Caviar and Truffle Oil, I am thinking, $20 Cocktails at Prive in The Bellagio, Las Vegas, I am thinking, Cheap, I am thinking, I would pay double, I am thinking, Prive Miami, I am thinking, 3am with two Venezuelan Model Girls, I am thinking, Why don’t my good looks fade with age?, I am thinking, Why couldn’t my parents be accountants?, I am thinking, Instead of IRA and ETA Killers?, I am thinking, Should I start a revolution?, I am thinking, Revolution is in my Blood, I am thinking, Or should I just be The Greatest International Playboy ever?, I am thinking, Could I break Wilt Chamberlin’s record?, I am thinking, And I am not talking about his basketball records, I am thinking, I have swooped at least one girl the last 500 plus nights I have gone out, I am thinking, Could I be the Muhammad Ali of Players?, I am thinking, Why do girls like me so much?, I am thinking, Is it my custom suits from Italy?, I am thinking, or my personality?, I am thinking, Do I care?, I am thinking, Why do I single handedly destroy Rival Crews? I am thinking, Why don’t other guys figure out that dressing sharp, carrying CASH, smiling, and lying is all it takes to get beautiful girls?, I am thinking, My Game is so advanced I could swoop Jennifer Lopez, I am thinking, with her husband in the same room, I am thinking, My Game is like Roberto Duran in his prime, I am thinking, Mano de Piedra, I am thinking, Desert Eagle, I am thinking, Why are all my peers married and moved to the suburbs?, I am thinking, or Dead, in Jail, or in a mental hospital for the Criminally Insane?, I am thinking, Why do you I still wonder how much money is in every armored car that I see?, I am thinking, Could I ever be a killer?, I am thinking, Is it the Gatti Vs Ward trilogy our generations’ Graziano Vs Zale?, I am thinking, Why did I rob a Crack House with my crew armed with Baseball Bats for only 4k when I was 16 years old?, I am thinking, Why don’t I own a single pair of jeans?, I am thinking, Why don’t I retire to Saint Tropez?, Half-way players being chopped apart, I am thinking, 62 Cadillac Coup Deville, I am thinking, Veuve Clicquot and Ponies, I am thinking, Warm Peekytoe-Maryland Lump Crab Cake with truffle oil and Osetra Caviar, I am thinking, Why do all my friends carry guns?, I am thinking, Why does exchanging fashion tips with Street Pimps at 5am seem normal to me, I am thinking, Why do Latin girls have way better asses than White Girls?, I am thinking, Why do Latin girls move way better than white girls? I am thinking, ETRO Suits, I am thinking, Copper top Bullets, I am thinking, Steak Tartare at 3am Dream City, I am thinking, Why does last call have to be at 1:30am in California? I am thinking, Why do I meet beautiful, Intelligent, rich girls and not marry them?, I am thinking, Why have I been shot at three times and never killed?, I am thinking, Why have I never had the stomach for Pimping?, I am thinking, Why do I think everyone I meet is a hick? I am thinking, Why do I feel comfortable at Blue Blood Charity Balls in NYC? I am thinking, And feel comfortable chillin with members of the Venice Shoreline Crips and V13? I am thinking, Gucci Loafers, I am thinking, with White Piping, I am thinking, Jumbo Stone Crabs for $45 each at Prime One Twelve in Miami Beach, I am thinking, Cheap, I am thinking…………
This week we are going to address an email that was sent to The G Manifesto:
“I wanted to let you know that I love the G Manifesto and all your advice. I dont mean to disrespect you but it seems like all your advice is for people that have a lot of money. I want to get girls and be a G. I am young (19) and want to be like you so if you if you could tell me how to make some cash that would help. Thanks. John.”
Alright John. First of all, you can never be me. Second, Stay in School, study hard, take a corporate job, marry an ex-sorority girl that can’t cook and move to the suburbs. Do you really want the life of The G? Do you really want sleeping with beautiful women to seem mundane because it happens so frequent like flight mileage? (Actually, sleeping with beautiful women never gets mundane) But, do you really want to dodge bullets, deal with hit squads, experience betrayal, have friends sellout, avoid snitches, Cops, date models, Exotic Dancers, high-society blue blood girls, have mad cash flow, travel to beautiful locales, get treated like a king in nightclubs, Sushi Chefs giving you the best cuts of Toro, and have a wardrobe and gun collection that’s equivalent to most “successful” peoples net worth? Maybe you do. Either way I am not going to give you any advice, but I will tell a little story of what I did when I was younger and you can take from it what you will. Fair Enough?
When you are a typical 19 years old guy you don’t have many options for work or girls. No one is really going to hire you for 150k a year to come to the office every day. And no self respecting girl over 22 years old is going to date you. You need CASH or you are basically fu**ed. Here is what I did:
When I was young I got a Valet job at one of the hottest nightclubs in Hollywood. You know, Celebs, Actors, Actresses, Fly Girls, Playboys, Working class stiffs who wanted to be a part of it all etc. A perfect spot for a young up and coming Prototype G. So pay attention John, here is your Blue Print for Money Making:
Take over the Valet Stand
This very important. There will usually be some sort of hierarchy established already at most Valet Stands. You stage a Takeover like Jay-Z (just make sure you don’t get Ethered). You need to get rid of the top guy by any means necessary. Get the top guy fired if you need to. This is what I did: My Running Partner at time and I were hired the same day. I then proceded to tell the top guy who we will call “Shane” that we were taking over. Shane then told me to “f*** off”. So I dropped punches on him from all angles on him like Chuck “The Iceman” Lidell and finished him with my Signature, Six Punch Combo (Jab, Jab, Straight Right, Left hook to the body, Left hook to the head, Right hook to the head…gets them every time). In his defense, he was from somewhere like Irvine, California and I am from, well, The Streets so it wasn’t like we were in the same “weight class”. Plus, I think he was a Mormon or something (no offense to Mormons, but when was the last time you saw a Mormon on HBO PPV holding a belt above his head?). Now that we took over, my Running Partner and I were in charge of all the scheduling and we gave ourselves all the best shifts so we could Cake UP. Give the other guys the Sunday brunch shift where the walk with $45. Keep the Wed, Thur, Fri, Sat nights for you are your crew where you can split with 3 bills each.
Establish an Inner Circle
You need to create an Inner Circle of Valet guys who count, control and distribute the money. This way, you don’t have to split the cash evenly between all the workers. Lets say for instance there are 5 guys working on the night and $800 in tips to split up. Say three of you are in the “Inner Circle” and two are not. Give $200 in tips to each Inner Circle member and $100 to each guy outside the circle. Just that easy, you are making twice as much money as the next guy!
Learn Cars and who tips well
If you see a 60 year old cat roll up in a Sick Vintage GTO, let him know you will take care of him and give him a spot upfront. He might flip you a fifty. A 22 year old girl in a two door stick shift metallic purple Toyota Tercel is going to kick you a buck…..at best. Be wary of famous people. I parked Robin Leach’s ride(that jackass from “Lifestyles of The Rich and Famous” of all things) and he gave me $2! I wanted to grab the Louisville Slugger we kept at the Valet stand and destroy his ride, but my Running Partner stopped me. Who knows about how these young Hollywood actors tip today? My guess is they are cheap f***s. But then again, these days, it’s more likely that Ashton Kootchar chump would park my car than me parking his. (By the way, what is up with “young Hollywood” these days? What a collection of Fools. Every time I am partying in LA I can’t help but think how paper thin these guys are. I mean, come on, ripped jeans, dog tags, trucker hats, t-shirts ALWAYS with some gay design or writing on it, rings and bracelets? Weak. Not like I really care or give it much thought, but when someone finally wants to make a movie of my life, not one of these guys could play me on the big screen. Where are the DeNiro’s, Pacino’s, and Steven Bauer’s these days?)
Pretend like the Valet is full
This is a great hustle. Especially if you see some cat roll up fronting in a BMW with his girl. Tell him the lot is full but maybe you could make an exception if he takes care of you. He won’t want to seem like he is the cheap jerk like he really is in front of his chick. Good for a 20 plus every time. Make sure you exchange phone numbers with his girl when he is not looking.Guys like that just ask to get “knocked”.
Borrow the Fly Rides
One of the guys I worked with always took the NSX’s, Ferraris, and Porches for rides around town after the people entered the club. I personally liked the vintage Muscle Cars, Cadillacs and occasionally the Lincoln’s with Suicide Doors (and I don’t mean Suits VS SuicideGirls either). I would cruise the cars to say hello to girls I was trying to swoop on so they could see me in different fly rides all the time. This doesn’t really help you make Scratch, but it does help you Pick up Girls.
Crash Cars
We used to crash and dent cars all the time. When you return them to the people leaving the club, just make sure the person drives off the lot. Once they drive off the property you are no longer liable. Know where to pull the car up that is not well lit so the person can’t see the scratch all the way down his Lamborghini Countach. You don’t want to pay for all the damage you caused out of your own pocket, trust me.
The Skim
Every Valet lot has some system with tickets or what ever to track how many cars are parked every night. This is to determine how much money goes to the Club or the Valet Company. What ever the system is find a way to make it seem like you are parking less cars. Re-use tickets, make phony tickets, etc. You are the one doing all the work and you should make the Lionshare. Skim.
Swipe Pocket Change
Every car you park has at least a dollar in change in the ashtray. No one is going to miss it. Lets say you park 180 cars during a six hour shift, make sure you take a dollar in change out of every car. Who cares if the change is jingling in your pocket all night as you run around parking cars, you just increased your hourly pay rate by $30 an hour!
Swipe Drugs
If you are working at the right Nightclub/ Restaurant, plenty of Cars will have drugs in them. If a Mortgage Broker Type Guy pulls up in a Jaguar (actually, make that a two door weak BMW), “decent” girl in tow and they both have white rings around their nostrils, you better inspect the ride. When you park the ride, rifle thru the glove compartment, under the seat, and the center console. You will score. And it’s not like the guy is going to start yelling “Who took my Coke?!!!” when he realizes it’s gone. But know where the limits are. For instance, if an Asian Guy in a SharkSkin Issey Miyake Suit that looks like Brandon Lee, koi fish tattoos creeping up his neck, rolls up strapped in some Crazy Japanese Sports car with a super hot Asian Girl, “Blak Drgn” on his license plate, and you search his ride and find 20 kilos of heroin, you might not want to take it. Its up to you.
Deal Drugs
You have a perfect built in, ready made, supreme clientele (and I don’t mean that dope Ghostface album either). Other Valets, Club cocktail Waitresses, bartenders, Chefs, sous chefs, promoter guys, and bouncers all want drugs. Plus, a lot of the drugs you are getting are free. If you are working at the right spot, you should get solicited about 30 times a night for drugs by customers. I swooped some well known Actors girlfriends in those days because I was flipping, and the Actor guy thanked me for hooking them up after our transaction! Make sure you have it all; grass, beans, beeks, etc.. Start bankrolling other Valets. Who cares if you get fired? It is just a Valet job! Just make sure you save a little for a good Criminal Defense Attorney. (I am not certain, but I think the government doesn’t agree with some of this stuff…check your local laws). Who would have thought you could make $124,800 a year parking cars?! Tax free. Not bad for a 19 year old.
Lessons to be Learned for People who want to Valet their cars:
1.Never Valet your car
2.If you Really have to Valet your car, Never leave anything in it of value i.e. Guns, CASH, Drugs, uncut Emeralds, etc…
3.Always check your car before pulling away. (Unless you stole the car in the first place, which is the only circumstance that I will Valet)
4.Never Valet your car….
Keep in mind, there are a hundreds of us just like me, who cuss like me, dress sharp like me, walk, talk, act like me, might be the next best thing, but not quite me.The Rest is Up to You………………
