Haircut
I always like to get a haircut before Track Season starts. When you have spent the last 6 weeks swooping topless girls in Spain (La Cote des Basques and the Med) your hair tends to grow. Must be the Mediterranean diet. Or the Basque seafood. Or the vino tinto. (The G Manifesto’s How to Pick up Topless Girls coming soon)
Suits
Make sure you get plenty of new custom suits made. Light colors all. Signature Cookie Monster Blue interior. And get your Pocket Square Game Tight.
Zippos
Make sure all your Zippos, Dunhills, and Dupont lighters are filled to the brim and have good action. Bring a minimum 3 packs of smokes.
Drugs (Optional)
Beeks and Beans are still mad popular. As Bill Maher says, “People are doing as much Cocaine as they did in the 80’s. They just aren’t sharing it anymore.” Careful in this heat when you are on the beeks though.
Real Time with Bill Maher: New Rules – July 17 2009
Enter The Dragon
Get your rounds in. They will pay dividends. I would be lying to you if I didn’t tell you I am in amazing shape. (Getting slotted and swooping Topless girls will do that to you.) The G Manifesto’s Exit The Dragon, Enter The Cobra coming soon.
Heater
Breathe again. Because I don’t do extortion unless I am on the receiving end.
Turf Club
Make sure you get your Turf Club scenario ironed out. (I just got my re-upped membership in the mail). Or else you will be with the buffoons in the suspect Glittery Ed Hardy Shirts, looking like a nonce, drinking out of plastic with no air conditioning..
Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA GFK, Jr.
AKA The Sly, Slick and the Wicked
AKA The Voodoo Child
The Guide to Getting More out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com
Recently, however, I flipped the script. After having more than 50 girls tell me to watch Vicky Cristina Barcelona, I peeped it.
Having lived in Barcelona as a younger prototype G and visited many times since, it was a real pleasure to see the beautiful Catalunyan scenery in the movie.
The one part of the movie that kind of pissed me off was how it threw up on the silver screen for all to see how you swoop two girls at once AKA pulling a “Vicky Cristina”.
I have been using this tactic for years, in fact, I have been almost gotten beyond it. Hell, I even wrote the definitive piece on How to Pick up Three Girls at Once AKA The Trio a while back.
None of this takes away from the fact that Pulling a Vicky Cristina can be a very effective/innovative move for the upwardly mobile International Playboy on The Rise. At least, it will help cut through the boredom in American Nightlife and the ennui associated with American Girls.
Paco de Lucia – Entre dos Aguas
Here is how it is done:
Find the Right Venue
Well, the “wrong” venues, thankfully, are wack spots, sports bars, low end clubs etc. Places you shouldn’t be hanging out at anyways. If you see Ed Hardy shirts and Plastic Tiaras, you are in the wrong place.
Other signs to look for: People that look like they hang out at Palms Casino Resort in Las Vegas, Beenies, tribal tattoos, and girls yelling “Wooo! Girls Night Out! I love my girls!” and other earsplitting phrases. (Seriously, if I hear this type of crap one more time, I am liable to go bonkers, smoke some Sherm Stick, go on a West Coast “Who Ride” and end up wanted for a homicide.)
Conversely, the “right” venues are high-end lounges, Gentleman’s Clubs (of course, this doesn’t really apply to this Chamber of the Manifesto, although technically a great location to pull a Vicky Cristina), Model Girl Bars, sensual restaurants were the Chef does all kinds of sexy things with food, lobby bars of Fly hotels, The French Riviera, South Beach, and of course, Catalunya.
If the drinks are expensive, drugs are being consumed at a rapid pace and the girls look like something you would see on the cover of a Spanish fashion magazine, you are in the right place, Oh my brothers.
Other signs to look for: Titled Royals, Girls dripping with diamonds on their décolletage, a blow dealer you knew from way back, daughters of Industrialist families, etc.
Find The Right Girls
Again thankfully, like many advanced tactics in The World of Game, Pulling a Vicky Cristina actually works better with flyer girls. And richer girls. And smarter girls. And surprisingly, girls with good breeding. Girls traveling. Model girls. Arriviste American Girls. Run of the mill average to decent looking American girls are not good prospects. They like feminine guys, hipsters, Wimpsters, beta males, regular guy and Chrisitan Audiger wearing Buffons. Leave the wack girls for them.
Furthermore, pulling a Vicky Cristina on regular attractive American Girls, is a respectable result but pulling a “VC” on two high-society fly girls is agnate to winning Roland Garros. Or at least a satellite in Dusseldorf.
(Pulling a Vicky Cristina on two fly Exotic Dancers is a good way to pass the time, but let’s face it, who hasn’t done that literally hundreds of times by now?)
Dress Fly
This is an essential. Pulling a Vicky Cristina without dressing sharp is like Rumba without a Trumpet. Or a Parranda without booze and Chicas de la Noche.
If you know me by now, then you know I am predisposed toward Custom suits. Maybe something bespoke and “off-Row” by Douglas Hayward’s Shoppe (95 Mount Street) or Brian Staples’ Shoppe (26 Kingly Street). But with summer already here (The Kentucky Derby marks the start of summer on The G Manifesto Calendar) Resort Style is what I have been flowing with recently.
Think bold shirts, Crimsons, Lavenders, Custom Guayaberas, Irish Linen pants, Gucci Loafers, things like that. Walther P38. Pockets on Green like yellow and blue. Ties looking like a mural. Pocket squares: spiritual, like a ritual.
You want to catch Vicky Cristina prospects eye before approaching. The Art of War. Win every battle before it is fought.
Confidence
You need to come with Extreme confidence when pulling a Vicky Cristina. Fly girls these day are swarmed by all sorts of gigolos, cads, vulgarians, scoundrels, rouges and bounders.
Any hint of weakness in your Game and girls will attack like a lioness smelling sangre on the Shamwari Game Reserve.
For me this isn’t a quandary. Pulling Vicky Cristinas begets more Vicky Cristinas. Top tier Lotharios have verbals hitting hard like Edwin “El Chapo” Rosario. Charmant.
And always be aware of the dark forces that lie hidden beneath the surface, the ones that some people call superstitions: howling banshees, black cats, witches, hats on beds, dogs, The Evil Eye.
giulia y los tellarini- La Ley Del Retiro
Be Latin
You can’t really control this, but if you have Latin blood, you will pull more Vicky Cristina’s then people without Latin Blood. I have done an unofficial case study on this. This is also why whenever you see a smooth cat swooping two girls cold out of at bar, 9 times out of 10 he is some sort of Latin cat. Don’t blame me, this has been going on since the 20’s. Sure there are historically top tier Playboys from other spots, most notably Gunter Sachs and the Guinness kids. If you don’t have Latin blood, maybe try using a fake foreign accent. (Picking up Girls with fake foreign accents will be covered in a future G Manifesto).
Play off both Girls Common Pick up Theory suggests, when picking up a girl in a two set, you open, neg the target, and gain trust and rapport with the other girl, build rapport and attraction etc. etc. etc.
When pulling a Vicky Cristina, you need to Raise Sexual Tension with Both Girls and neg both girls constantly. Whenever you get rebuffed, simply be calm and act like there is nothing out of the ordinary with your proposal of untamed passion, pleasure, bliss and heaven. Re-frame. And use the right line of Palaver. Remember, there is no Eye like innderstanding.
Keep the Vino Flowing Vino is the official drink of pulling off a Vicky Cristina. Top Shelf Vodka Sodas work as well, as does the occasional shot. But pound for pound, round for round, Vino is the Heavyweight Champ of Mood Setters.
E-Tabs are known to work as well. But that’s neither Lucite heels nor dollar bill peels. And spark up cigarettes for style points. Or light up the cigar and let the aroma reach up. It’s like the smile on the Mona Lisa or like a falcon flying over Giza.
Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA GFK, Jr.
AKA The Sly, Slick and the Wicked
AKA The Voodoo Child
The Guide to Getting More out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com
It seems like everybody these days, qualified or not, is spitting out information about How to Pick up Girls. As you know, over at The G Manifesto, we are light years ahead of everyone else.
One of the biggest problems you will run into if you follow The G Manifesto to The Seventh Letter, is you will have more girls that you know what to do with. Which in turn will bog you down from swooping more girls. A classic vicious cycle.
And if you swoop 100 plus fly girls year over year (like I do), and regulate them on 3000 thread count Egyptian Cotton sheets (like I do), you will get girls that want to play you close like Nutella plays toast (like I do).
The True Art of The Game is How to Un-Pick up Girls.
Keep in mind, I said this is an “Art”. It is not about being an asshole to girls. Any regular guy from Rehab at The Hard Rock in an Affliction shirt can do that. It’s about subtly “cooling out” girls, much like the old-school Con Men did to their “Marks”.
Ideally, you want her to “break up” with you (girls are just like lawyers, you have to be one step ahead and make them think it is their idea), but you don’t want to piss the girl off so much that you can never swoop her again.
The key is being able to “back-burner” girls so you are able to swoop the girls again down the road. (And swoop her fly friends). If you can throw a fly girl on the team, she can be a gift that keeps on giving.
Here is how it is done:
Smoking Smoking cigarettes works great while initially swooping girls. However, even the most “smoke friendly” girls these days will get over you soon enough if you are constantly spracking up. Chain smoking works especially well on American Girls and specifically Southern California girls. American Girls are now hardwired to hate chain smoking from pop-culture, Hollywood, glossy magazines and status quo thinking.
Aloof Game
Again, being aloof works great during attraction stages. Nevertheless, if you continue to be aloof towards girls they will finally reach the breaking point and want to call it quits. The best part of “Aloof Game” is when you run into the same girl 6 months later and she sees you dressed in custom vines, she won’t remember why she broke it off. She will probably apologize for not keeping in touch!
Heaters I have said before that girls claim they like “Bad Boys” (girl’s language, not mine). The truth is, what girls really like is mass produced, mall purchased, corporate created Bad Boys. All but the most down girls will run the other way if you leave your Desert Eagle out on your Isamu Noguchi table with Ski Masks. Surprisingly, I have even used this on fly girls that have dated sons of famous, and I mean, historically famous Organized Crime figures. To great effect.
Mc Eiht – Straight Up Menace
Travel
This is the key. When you first meet a girl, you have to imply/tell a girl you travel a lot. For your humble author, this is easy, since I do. After you take her home that night and swoop her, tell her you have to go on a trip to Rio de Janeiro or Latvia or something. It’s the perfect “cool out”. Then call her a week and a half later and swoop her again. Rinse and Repeat. Sooner or later, she will meet some Ed Hardy shirt guy that will sponsor her and she will break up with you!
Other Girls
Always say “what up” and give other girls you run into “two kisses” greetings when you are “dating” a girl. Get other girls phone numbers in front of the girl you are “dating”. Say something like, “she is on the board of such and such charity. She is a good girl to know”. After a while, even the most confident of girls (yes, I have done this on the most self assured Flyest Girls) will get edgy. It has to be natural though. Havoc said it best; “Hav’ don’t change for no chick, and they adapt to him. Never get cool with you ni$ggaz, I end up clappin ’em”
Drugs
This one is risky, especially in The Down Economy, because a lot of fly girls love Drugs. You should only do this one on some moralistic Red State girl. The other risk, is a lot of girls “motherly” instinct will come out and they will want to “save you”. Still, heavy drug use is a classic on getting girls itchy. When you meet her down the line (so to speak) you can tell her you washed up your act and have been keeping your nose clean (so to speak). Re-swoop.
DJ Quik – Tha Bombudd
Success Stories
If you constantly tell stories about your successes, and do it with a very high degree of swagger, most girls will want to breakup with you after a while. Girls, by and large are vindictive creatures that that want to keep you down. Only the best of the best actually want you to enjoy the rosy hue of unlimited success. (Makes no sense, I know).
Never two nights in a row
One of the easiest ways to avoid getting in two deep (and I don’t mean that 90’s rap duo from Vallejo, CA either) is to never spend two nights in a row with a girl. Most cats will swoop a girl for the first time on a Friday night and take her out on Saturday night. After you swoop a girl, go on vacation. Swoop her again a week later. Keep her on that “once per week” program and sooner or later she will “want more” and cut you loose.
N2DEEP – Back To The Hotel
If all else fails:
Serial Killers
Leave biographies of Serial Killers around your crib. It doesn’t matter if it is a book about “The Stockwell Strangler”,” The Lambeth Poisoner”, “The Sunderland Strangler”, “The Acid Bath Murderer”, “The Vampire of London”, “The Camden Ripper”, “The Beast in the Night”, “The Wolf Man”, “The Sneinton Strangler”, “The Black Panther”, “Palmer the Poisoner”, “The Brides in the Bath”, “The Yorkshire Ripper”, “House of Horrors”, “The Ipswich Ripper”, “The Freeway Killer”, “The Hillside Strangler” or “The Shoe Fetish Slayer”.
But for maximum effect, biographies about Ed Gein (not the Maître d’ at Canal bar either), Son of Sam, or Ted Bundy probably work best.
If the girl doesn’t mind all the above techniques, she is probably a cool girl and you should date her.
Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA GFK, Jr.
AKA The Sly, Slick and the Wicked
AKA The Voodoo Child
The Guide to Getting More out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com
In summertime, when you have mad fly girls coming over to your crib, a great move is to keep a grip of popsicles on stock. Make sure you get the bomb pops, Firecracker Pops, Otter Pops and the Big Stick Cherry pops.
Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA GFK, Jr.
AKA The Sly, Slick and the Wicked
AKA The Voodoo Child
The Guide to Getting More out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com
Over the last six months or so, people have been constantly asking me things like: “Michael, what’s your thoughts on Facebook and Game?” and “Yo, G what is your take on the iPhone?” and drivel like, “Does an International Playboy Twitter?”
Here is my take:
Facebook
Admittedly, I am a very low-tech person. Call me Miguel Analog instead of Michael Digital. But I do keep up with tech trends because I am friends with some Tech Crim Crews and they tell me I should open accounts on these things. (Here is my Facebook and Twitter)
In fact, I was happy with the days of pay phones.
Facebook, however has completely taken over nightlife with the rise of the Beta Male, Hipster and Wimpsters.
Every time you enter the club, cameras are going off like crazy. I have mentioned before how I always avoid “Party Pics”. For no other reason, that I cannot be placed in a certain place and a certain time. I may need to “snuff” someone after all. Or pull a Heist.
It is getting so ridiculous that the other night, I went to a wine bar opening and some “legendary” (I am using that term loosely here) Nightlife Photographer was trying to take a snap of me while I was trying to “Vicky Christina” these two fly girls. I quickly covered his lens and “accidentally” pushed the digi cam into his eye socket possibly a little too hard. (An accident, I swear).
Young girls these days are snapping non-stop pictures in the club destined for Facebook. It seems like today’s youth is more concerned with documenting the night than actually enjoying it.
I have said it before, and I will say it again, the most popular drug this decade: Celebrity.
I wish we would go back to beeks and beans.
Young girls also can’t seem to shut up about Facebook. I swooped this ideal girl on paper (parents with long dough, half-latina, close to beautiful, feminine, crib on a cliff overlooking the beach in one of Southern California’s most exclusive beach towns etc), but I had to 86 her after hearing her and her friends yap about “de-friending” and “friending” and crap for an hour. It was painful. If I had some heron I would have snorted it.
Facebook has also given rise to a “Facebook Player” of sorts. Typically, some young Hipster/Wimpster that pitches girls all day long on Facebook while wearing a fedora.
Every time you have some kind of sitdown or meal with a bunch of cats, trying to conduct some biz, there is always at least one f$ckhead going on and on about how much he loves his iPhone.
And it is always an unsolicited conversation. “I love how functional the iPhone is!”, and “Check out this new app!” or “This touch screen is so responsive!”
Look you nonce, first of all, I didn’t ask you about your iPhone. Second, I change cell phones every month, so I typically buy some weesh one I can toss. And third, I don’t even really know what an “app” is.
Girls are always flicking around on their iPhone screen trying to show you some “Party Pics”, that I have no interest in.
I still don’t really understand Twitter. The way I look at it is if you were having a great time, you have no time to “tweat” or whatever it is called.
I am always busy and pulling dope moves, hence my minimal “tweatering”.