I haven’t been watching the Olympics too much because the US Boxing Team is on the ropes. And most of the sports are just way too boring, save of course, women’s gymnastics. Plus, I have just had a lot on my plate lately. (When I say “I have a lot on my plate, I mean I have been swooping tons of fly girls…fyi).
I came up with a great idea last night to really up the viewer ship of the Olympics: make Exotic Dancing an Olympic Sport.
I can’t believe no one has thought of this before.
Imagine (and I don’t mean Imagine who works at Seemless, real name Sarah either):
“And taking the Gold for the USA…Jasmine (real name Cindy) from The Spearmint Rhino in Las Vegas, Nevada!”
The Olympic committee should seriously consider this.
The Rest is Up To You…
Michael Porfirio Mason AKA The Peoples Champ AKA The Game Doctor Spock The Guide to Getting More out of Life http://www.thegmanifesto.com
Rick James – Superfreak [youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tjVF3TuupW0&hl=en&fs=1]
Kardinal Offishall ft. Akon – Dangerous – Soon to be Gentleman’s Club Classic
Akon has a nack for these “Gentleman’s Club Classic’s”.
Doesn’t he?
Ohhh yeah, that’s her
The big dog tryin to get her little kitty to purr
Next man lookin at me like I’m Lucifer
Cause he knows I’ll deal with the case yes sir
If I was the last man on earth,
I would only take that girl, end the search
She’ll give a new definition to the word curve
Got chicks in the strip club, envying her’s
Bodies like (what), is a mass irruptions,
Sit the glass on that fat obstruction,
Tongue game give a new type seduction
I’m try and get back her something
Rick’s Cabaret to purchase Scores-Las Vegas club for $21 million
Rick’s Cabaret International Friday said it would buy Scores-Las Vegas for $21 million, a dope move it said would add 29 cents a share to its annual earnings.
Scores is a 23,000-square foot club of pure heaven (or maybe its hell, either way, it’s dope) located in Las Vegas.
Under the terms of the agreement, Rick’s will pay $16 million in cash and a $5 million convertible debenture (really a bargain if you think about it) that bears 4% interest. Rick’s will also get an option to buy the property on which the club is located (probably a good move).
The deal is expected to happen on June 10.
Shares of Ricks’s is up 83% over the past 52 weeks. I have been riding this stock since back in 2004 around the pre-Katrina days when I was chopping up Ricks New Orleans like the Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Or those cats that owned the Gemini Lounge.
So, you have convinced the Exotic Dancer, who earlier in the week won a $750 pole dancing competition at a rival Gentleman’s Club, to cruise home with you when she gets off work. (Which, is weird, since I recently swooped on an Exotic Dancer who won a $750 pole dancing competition at a rival Gentleman’s Club earlier this week. But that’s neither Brioni nor Armani.) But you still are far from Paradise (and I don’t mean Club Paradise in Las Vegas or Club Paradise in Kiev, Ukraine either). Either way, you have been keeping a grin on her now. And she wants to travel with you where they wear bikinis in the winter too now. And maybe she thinks, in time, you will spend a few thou. So, things are looking lovely (and I don’t mean that fly Exotic Dancer I know named Lovely that works at Scores in NYC, real name Cindy, either). But before she wants to come over to you crib, she wants to get something to eat. We all are familiar with the concept that Exotics like to eat after work. The pinnacle moment of the swoop comes when she says something like, “Do you want to go to Denny’s?” and you say “Sure, I will meet you there”. Wrong answer.
Side note: Exotic Dancers don’t always have the best taste in late night cuisine.
Wu-Tang Clan – Ice Cream
Meeting an Exotic Dancer at a place like Denny’s isn’t a horrible move on paper (after all, you are doing better that 99.9% of the guys in the Gentleman’s Club, since you actually Are meeting an Exotic Dancer after she gets off work). But keep in mind, you are still a few rounds away from winning a unanimous decision on the judges cards. Meeting an Exotic at a place like Denny’s, does open you up to many potential Cambodian Landmines.
Running into guys from the Gentleman’s Club that she fleeced for $1200 earlier in the night.
Running into regular drunk guy, eating some “Moons over My Hammy”, trying to put salt in your Game.
Tina Turner “Private Dancer”
So how does the upwardly mobile G get past this? Great question. The best thing to do is meet at your crib or luxury hotel room and keep some high-end cuisine on staff at your crib. I typically keep some freshly made insalata caprese made with Imported buffalo mozzarella, heirloom tomatoes, basil vinaigrette, or Côte de porc charcutière with hand rolled gnocchi or freshly caught surf clam with nasturtium, cucumber and shallots in my fridge for situations such as these. At least, keep some imported High-end meats and cheeses in the fridge. Let’s face it though, you can probably have some pizza or homemade pastas on hand and it will probably do the trick. I just like to go for the style points that haute cuisine brings. Plus I like Salmón a la sidra con huevas de trucha at 3am.
Donna Summer – Bad Girls (at Johnny Carson’s in 1979)
Having Haute Cuisine on staff is preferable to cooking food at your crib as well. This is especially apparent when you have got two Exotics at your crib. The time it takes to bust out some Lobster Ravioli’s with a Peekytoe Crab Aurora Sauce could make the Exotics lose their edge. And we don’t want anyone to lose their edge, right?
(Want to see something in The G Manifesto? Send suggestions to thegmanifesto@yahoo.com)
Patra – Worker Man (not sure what is about Patra. Except she might be the hottest girl who has ever lived. But I am not sure why. Watch this and maybe you can help me figure it out.) Either way, I think it is time for a trip to Jamaica again.
DONNA SUMMER Bad Girls (Demo 1979) I like this version also.
