The G Manifesto

Why you shouldn’t Valet Park your Car

This week we are going to address an email that was sent to The G Manifesto:

“I wanted to let you know that I love the G Manifesto and all your advice. I dont mean to disrespect you but it seems like all your advice is for people that have a lot of money. I want to get girls and be a G. I am young (19) and want to be like you so if you if you could tell me how to make some cash that would help. Thanks. John.”

Alright John. First of all, you can never be me. Second, Stay in School, study hard, take a corporate job, marry an ex-sorority girl that can’t cook and move to the suburbs. Do you really want the life of The G? Do you really want sleeping with beautiful women to seem mundane because it happens so frequent like flight mileage? (Actually, sleeping with beautiful women never gets mundane) But, do you really want to dodge bullets, deal with hit squads, experience betrayal, have friends sellout, avoid snitches, Cops, date models, Exotic Dancers, high-society blue blood girls, have mad cash flow, travel to beautiful locales, get treated like a king in nightclubs, Sushi Chefs giving you the best cuts of Toro, and have a wardrobe and gun collection that’s equivalent to most “successful” peoples net worth? Maybe you do. Either way I am not going to give you any advice, but I will tell a little story of what I did when I was younger and you can take from it what you will. Fair Enough?

When you are a typical 19 years old guy you don’t have many options for work or girls. No one is really going to hire you for 150k a year to come to the office every day. And no self respecting girl over 22 years old is going to date you. You need CASH or you are basically fu**ed. Here is what I did:

When I was young I got a Valet job at one of the hottest nightclubs in Hollywood. You know, Celebs, Actors, Actresses, Fly Girls, Playboys, Working class stiffs who wanted to be a part of it all etc. A perfect spot for a young up and coming Prototype G. So pay attention John, here is your Blue Print for Money Making:

Take over the Valet Stand

This very important. There will usually be some sort of hierarchy established already at most Valet Stands. You stage a Takeover like Jay-Z (just make sure you don’t get Ethered). You need to get rid of the top guy by any means necessary. Get the top guy fired if you need to. This is what I did: My Running Partner at time and I were hired the same day. I then proceded to tell the top guy who we will call “Shane” that we were taking over. Shane then told me to “f*** off”. So I dropped punches on him from all angles on him like Chuck “The Iceman” Lidell and finished him with my Signature, Six Punch Combo (Jab, Jab, Straight Right, Left hook to the body, Left hook to the head, Right hook to the head…gets them every time). In his defense, he was from somewhere like Irvine, California and I am from, well, The Streets so it wasn’t like we were in the same “weight class”. Plus, I think he was a Mormon or something (no offense to Mormons, but when was the last time you saw a Mormon on HBO PPV holding a belt above his head?). Now that we took over, my Running Partner and I were in charge of all the scheduling and we gave ourselves all the best shifts so we could Cake UP. Give the other guys the Sunday brunch shift where the walk with $45. Keep the Wed, Thur, Fri, Sat nights for you are your crew where you can split with 3 bills each.

Establish an Inner Circle

You need to create an Inner Circle of Valet guys who count, control and distribute the money. This way, you don’t have to split the cash evenly between all the workers. Lets say for instance there are 5 guys working on the night and $800 in tips to split up. Say three of you are in the “Inner Circle” and two are not. Give $200 in tips to each Inner Circle member and $100 to each guy outside the circle. Just that easy, you are making twice as much money as the next guy!

Learn Cars and who tips well

If you see a 60 year old cat roll up in a Sick Vintage GTO, let him know you will take care of him and give him a spot upfront. He might flip you a fifty. A 22 year old girl in a two door stick shift metallic purple Toyota Tercel is going to kick you a buck…..at best. Be wary of famous people. I parked Robin Leach’s ride(that jackass from “Lifestyles of The Rich and Famous” of all things) and he gave me $2! I wanted to grab the Louisville Slugger we kept at the Valet stand and destroy his ride, but my Running Partner stopped me. Who knows about how these young Hollywood actors tip today? My guess is they are cheap f***s. But then again, these days, it’s more likely that Ashton Kootchar chump would park my car than me parking his. (By the way, what is up with “young Hollywood” these days? What a collection of Fools. Every time I am partying in LA I can’t help but think how paper thin these guys are. I mean, come on, ripped jeans, dog tags, trucker hats, t-shirts ALWAYS with some gay design or writing on it, rings and bracelets? Weak. Not like I really care or give it much thought, but when someone finally wants to make a movie of my life, not one of these guys could play me on the big screen. Where are the DeNiro’s, Pacino’s, and Steven Bauer’s these days?)

Pretend like the Valet is full

This is a great hustle. Especially if you see some cat roll up fronting in a BMW with his girl. Tell him the lot is full but maybe you could make an exception if he takes care of you. He won’t want to seem like he is the cheap jerk like he really is in front of his chick. Good for a 20 plus every time. Make sure you exchange phone numbers with his girl when he is not looking. Guys like that just ask to get “knocked”.

Borrow the Fly Rides

One of the guys I worked with always took the NSX’s, Ferraris, and Porches for rides around town after the people entered the club. I personally liked the vintage Muscle Cars, Cadillacs and occasionally the Lincoln’s with Suicide Doors (and I don’t mean Suits VS SuicideGirls either). I would cruise the cars to say hello to girls I was trying to swoop on so they could see me in different fly rides all the time. This doesn’t really help you make Scratch, but it does help you Pick up Girls.

Crash Cars

We used to crash and dent cars all the time. When you return them to the people leaving the club, just make sure the person drives off the lot. Once they drive off the property you are no longer liable. Know where to pull the car up that is not well lit so the person can’t see the scratch all the way down his Lamborghini Countach. You don’t want to pay for all the damage you caused out of your own pocket, trust me.

The Skim

Every Valet lot has some system with tickets or what ever to track how many cars are parked every night. This is to determine how much money goes to the Club or the Valet Company. What ever the system is find a way to make it seem like you are parking less cars. Re-use tickets, make phony tickets, etc. You are the one doing all the work and you should make the Lionshare. Skim.

Swipe Pocket Change

Every car you park has at least a dollar in change in the ashtray. No one is going to miss it. Lets say you park 180 cars during a six hour shift, make sure you take a dollar in change out of every car. Who cares if the change is jingling in your pocket all night as you run around parking cars, you just increased your hourly pay rate by $30 an hour!

Swipe Drugs

If you are working at the right Nightclub/ Restaurant, plenty of Cars will have drugs in them. If a Mortgage Broker Type Guy pulls up in a Jaguar (actually, make that a two door weak BMW), “decent” girl in tow and they both have white rings around their nostrils, you better inspect the ride. When you park the ride, rifle thru the glove compartment, under the seat, and the center console. You will score. And it’s not like the guy is going to start yelling “Who took my Coke?!!!” when he realizes it’s gone. But know where the limits are. For instance, if an Asian Guy in a SharkSkin Issey Miyake Suit that looks like Brandon Lee, koi fish tattoos creeping up his neck, rolls up strapped in some Crazy Japanese Sports car with a super hot Asian Girl, “Blak Drgn” on his license plate, and you search his ride and find 20 kilos of heroin, you might not want to take it. Its up to you.

Deal Drugs

You have a perfect built in, ready made, supreme clientele (and I don’t mean that dope Ghostface album either). Other Valets, Club cocktail Waitresses, bartenders, Chefs, sous chefs, promoter guys, and bouncers all want drugs. Plus, a lot of the drugs you are getting are free. If you are working at the right spot, you should get solicited about 30 times a night for drugs by customers. I swooped some well known Actors girlfriends in those days because I was flipping, and the Actor guy thanked me for hooking them up after our transaction! Make sure you have it all; grass, beans, beeks, etc.. Start bankrolling other Valets. Who cares if you get fired? It is just a Valet job! Just make sure you save a little for a good Criminal Defense Attorney. (I am not certain, but I think the government doesn’t agree with some of this stuff…check your local laws). Who would have thought you could make $124,800 a year parking cars?! Tax free. Not bad for a 19 year old.

Lessons to be Learned for People who want to Valet their cars:

1. Never Valet your car

2. If you Really have to Valet your car, Never leave anything in it of value i.e. Guns, CASH, Drugs, uncut Emeralds, etc…

3. Always check your car before pulling away. (Unless you stole the car in the first place, which is the only circumstance that I will Valet)

4. Never Valet your car….

Keep in mind, there are a hundreds of us just like me, who cuss like me, dress sharp like me, walk, talk, act like me, might be the next best thing, but not quite me. The Rest is Up to You………………

Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA The Yeti
AKA Snow Man
The BluePrint for Money Making
http://www.thegmanifesto.com

Off The Books….Beatnuts, Big Pun (Rip), Cuban Link……

The Club at Home and Amsterdam Naps

The Club at Home

We already know that The Nightclub, The Gentleman’s Club, The Lobby Bar, The Fights, The Race Track, Top-Notch Resturants, and High-End Gigs are where The G is most at home. But every now and then I switch up speeds like Bruce Lee riding a Fuji in a movie. Enter The Club at Home. The Club at Home is exactly that; having a Nightclub type experience at home. The best way to do it is Control the Guest list. When I do the Club at Home is I am the only guy invited. As far as girls, you are best if you go with a Regining Nightlife Princess, a few Fly Go-Go Dancers from a NightClub, or a mixed bag of Exotic Dancers. Better yet, it’s better to have The Club at Home at her crib than yours. Less mess to clean up.

Taking a page out of all the Asian-Themed clubs that are ridiculously overdone these days, get an order of Sushi on the books delivered over. Make sure to get plenty of Sake too. The Milky cold stuff is kind reminds me of the Korova Milk Bar. Moloko Plus. I can hear Vivaldi in the background. Dressed in the Height of Fashion. The Clear cold stuff is good to. The hot stuff is for rookies. All the Japanese Execs drink the cold sake. At the Atlantis in the Bahamas, I was chillin with a couple of cats from the Yamaguchi-gumi and they told me the same thing. Who am I to argue. Make sure you get Plenty of Sashimi also (It’s no secret that Nightlife Princesses love sashimi). I usually get plenty of Hamachi, Hamo, Inada, Uni, Maguro, and Toro. It’s wise to double up on the Toro. Get some rolls and maybe some Soft-Shell Crab Handrolls too. Monk-Fish liver (don’t tell her what it is) and Orange Clam for style points. Have it delivered. (You really need to have a Sushi Joint that delivers Top-Notch Sushi in your bag of tricks. If you don’t have a place that will deliver you sushi, you really need to give your self a reality check and start stepping it up.) Make sure you Grease the Delivery driver, that way he won’t mind making deliveries outside his normal area or after hours and he will keep you laced with the best cuts of Fresh Fish.

Make sure you have plenty of booze as well. The last thing you want to do is have to leave the crib to have to get more Goose or Champagne Mid-Club at Home. If the girl wants Beans or Beeks, I suggest not holding her back. But the decision is up to you. I have done an extensive unofficial Case Study and I have found that there is an inverse relationship between intoxication and girls clothes disappearing (keep in mind, I am not fully convinced on the data thus far and this study may turn into my life’s work). But hey, be my guest if you want to re-invent the wheel. Just make sure that the delivery guy doesn’t “make himself at home”. Side note: make sure the girl/ girls don’t get any bright ideas of inviting any guys over. More girls good. More guys bad. It’s really as simple as that. Don’t rule out turning off the girl’s cell phone or spilling a full glass of Chateau Leoville Barton St-Julien 2003 on it to render it not functioning (Armand de Brignac works well also).

One of the best parts about the Club at home is you can DJ the gig. So many clubs these days spin such wack records. And the DJ’s don’t count beats. I am not a professional DJ, but I can operate the One’s and Two’s. But Word Life, I can serve 90% of the DJ’s out there today. Most of the DJ’s today don’t know their history and haven’t done their homework. Like Mike D once said, “A lot of people claim to be Funky, but they are not students of the Funk”. Personally, I have a PHD in the Funk.

Once you have the pieces in place, spark up a smoke, kick up your Gucci Loafers and enjoy the entertainment.

The Amsterdam Nap

I invented Amsterdam Naps in Amsterdam back in 1994. They have been an important part of my Arsenal ever since. This was back when Raves were King and Beans could be had for two bucks each if not free (I had mad damage connects in those days). This was also during the music wars between Amsterdam and Rotterdam to see who could make there music faster. Girls had mad pony tails and pigtails, like Pippi-Longstockings. I think its cause of this period of my life that I pigtail a lot of my girls today, Pippi-Longstocking them. After a successful title shot Runner that some of my local Dutch G friends (one of whom was Top-Ranked Psycho-Killer/ Playboy) took me on, I needed to recharge my batteries. I slept for like 72 hours straight. No joke. Very different from the Vampire Nap (which is like for 5 to 20 minutes) but no less functional. Today, any nap over 24 hours qualifies as an Amsterdam Nap. Make sure you use a Tempra-pedic pillow or Tempra-pedic bed and some high thread count Egyptian Cottons. Turn the alarm clock off. The Rest is Up to You……..

Side Note:

Right now one of the most interesting Beefs in Hip-Hop is going on Between Jay-Z and the Dip-Set. The craziest part is that it seems Jim Jones is winning the battle. Now he has dragged in Nas as well (By the way the Nas track “Hip Hop is Dead” is off the rails). He is obviously in very deep water, going against two of the best lyricists in the Game, (and I not sure Jim Jones even raps that well) but the lesson to be learned is sometimes you have to take shots at the Main Guns. Jay might end up burying Jim Jones, but you have to love the underdog that has the guts to make a move (Jay does have some very futuristic word play on his new album that very few can touch, “I heard muthafuckers sayin’ they made Hov…,
Made Hov say ‘OK, so, make another Hov’…”). “Mami always told me to aim for the stars/ and now I’m beefing and I’m aiming at stars/ I pack heat like it came with the car, you catch em in the streets I’m a lay him like a broad/ Told Juan tell your old ass to chill/ Better slow down before your old ass get killed.” –Jim Jones

Side Note II:

Thinking about Amsterdam reminded me of a little story. My friend lets call him “Laurens” who I mentioned above was a Local Amsterdam G who I met when Game recognized Game…player recognition. He was at the time making a move in the Bean Trade, but some older Guys, real hoods, killers even, were the Top Kiddies. Laurens, who was along with being a funny guy and could Spit the Gift, was a first rate Sociopath. His ambitiousness was not looked upon too favorably by the older more established firm and when I was rolling mobb deep (and I am not talking about Rolling Deep that fresh London Grime Group either) with him the situation was a sneeze away from a full-on warfare. But amazingly, as the war heated up, “Accidents” befell both of the Main Guns of the other Firm. One committed suicide (and I don’t mean Suits VS SuicideGirls) fell asleep in his garage with his car running, death by affixation/Carbon Monoxide Poisoning. The other fell down an open elevator shaft in The Red Light District. After that he was the Top Bean Flipper. Just goes to show when you aim for the Stars.

Side note III:

Back in March in The Smoking Gun I gave a free investment tip: “Go long oil, long gambling, and long cigarette smuggling.” Exxon (XOM)was trading around 59 dollars then last week it was 75. Wynn (WYNN) was around 64 dollars last week it was almost 95. Obviously Cigarette smuggling has been profitable. I hope you took my advice. And yes, I do except thank you cards.

Email of the week in regards to Impeccable Technique: Vegas Beyond Undefeated:

“I never stopped believing in the G, you motor boat riding son of a bitch. Since I am a full fledged G now, I can appreciate the work of another fellow G. The “Vegas Guy” has defeated me in the past, I cannot not lie, but not anymore. I am quick to throw bows and draw my Nickel Plated these days like any other G, but I don’t find it necessary since I shit roses, piss Cristal and can talk Rosie O’Donnell out of finishing the last piece of cheesecake. I enjoyed last weekend at the Wynn when I swooped on pumpkin head Derek Jeter’s bitch, he looked at me, I flashed my silver and said “stick to your little wooden stick skippy”, I proceeded to take her to my dungeon and treat her like a soccer ball at a grade school in Portugal. Fun times, true story. Besides slinging gold Bullion coins, closing small arms deals with cartels in Belize and successfully drilling in Texas infill sites I have been pretty much the Dapper Don of G’s. I was in a high end liquor store in Tuscany last night and a fine woman with Royalty in her beautiful veins winked at me and said it smelled like a fresh Cuban Cigar, end of story!!!”

Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA Your Favorite Player’s Favorite Player
AKA Your Favorite G’s Favorite G
The Guide to Getting More Out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com

(Want to see something in The G Manifesto? Send suggestions to thegmanifesto@yahoo.com)

The girls in this video remind me of my crib last Tuesday at 3am……

Surf and Turf: The Race Track

[Rap] Aiyyo my lifestyle’s exquisite, Llello like a blizzard
[Nas] It’s choir attire standin on ground with one pivot
[Rap] Two players rockin silk blazers and diamonds like glaciers
[Nas] Lands with name brand seats reclinin like in spaceships
[Rap] Bodies on ice
[Nas] Livin trife, rollin fixed up dice
[Rap] Gamblin Grants
[Nas] Handlin stamps
[duo] Moves are sheist
[Nas] My bankrolls, got the cops comin in plain clothes
[Rap] Tryin to arraign again cause of our fame that’s how the game goes
[Nas] True
[Rap] Right out the slammer with the fame and glamour
Cookin up grams with Arm & Hammer supplyin scramblers in Alabama
[Nas] Rub out faces and leave no traces
My aces got mad body cases, preserve spaces at the horse races

(Murder. Simply some of the Sickest lyrics ever breathed into a microphone. “Fast Life” by Nas and Kool G Rap,
G Manifesto Certified Hall of Fame Track…….and just so you know its spelled “Llello” not yayo…its Spanish…… Skippy)

One of the favorite places for The G to hang out at, especially in Summertime, is the Race Track. In fact, The Kentucky Derby is the official Start of Summer on the G Manifesto Calendar. And Summer time officially ends on Closing Day. September 6^th at The Del Mar Thoroughbred Club on the West Coast and September 4^th at The Saratoga Race Track on the East Coast. Depends obviously on where you’re at (or where your going).

Winning at Gambling is very difficult at the race track. To paraphrase Andy Beyer, who has called horseracing “the greatest mathematical equation ever created” the odds are solidly against you. Good gamblers, Even great gamblers that win at other games get whacked at the Track. Me? I don’t gamble on horses too much. I operate on inside information, or have a jockey, or preferably jockeys in my back pocket. I also spend of a lot of time with the racing and sportsman set. This helps me get the edge I need. But mostly I go to the Race Track for the experience. Much like a Fight Night, the track is full of interesting characters. Big Money Horse owners, Jockeys, Trainers, Gold Diggers, Socialite Girls, Professional Team sports Coaches, Old Money, Nuevo Riche Jerks, Con Men, Models, Hollywood Actress Broads, Nightlife Princesses, Old-School G’s, G’s, G’s on the Rise, Prototype G’s, Gamblers, its like a modern day Damon Runyon Story. (Guess who is playing the role of the protagonist?)

However, you can’t just go to the racetrack with no preparation and game plan or you’re going to be outgunned. Like stepping into a gun fight with a deuce deuce against a four pound. It’s a war zone. You need to go stronger than ever, money longer than ever, longer Beretta. (And just so you know, personally, I am at war a lot like Anwar Sadat, no warning shot and my guns warm a lot)

Be well rested

Going into the racetrack you are going to need plenty of energy. Its summer time so it’s hot out. The track usually starts around 12 noon or sometimes 4pm. Either way you are in for a long day into the night, and you have to be ready for the night. I love going to the track during the week, because that’s when the real gamblers are there. I also love going to the track on Friday and Saturday, hell, even Sunday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday (never Mondays, I never eat seafood on a Monday, unless of course I am at Le Bernardin in NYC….props to Eric Ripert). Being well rested is difficult especially when you spent the night before getting massages and drinking Champagne with two exotic dancers till 5 am. So you might need to take a Vampire Nap or drink a Rockstar. Getting a workout and Entering The Dragon can also help take the place of lost Rapid Eye Movement. The best thing to do is hold off on booze when you first get to the track and really ease into the relaxed Atmosphere. Then ease into the Goose and Sodas, and I guarantee you, when you start seeing the summer dresses and smell the Coca butter and perfume you will start feeling wonderful. Plenty of time to get into the Seventh Dimension. The Race Track is one of the few places you will actually see me drink during the day.

Track Gear

You have to dress fresh at the track. My goal is to always dress the freshest. I can’t remember the last time I didn’t achieve my goal. And I have a great memory. You can never go wrong going old-school style: Seersucker Suits, Spectator shoes, etc. Make sure you wear a light colored suit as well. You’ll look like you only own one suit if you go in a dark collared one, which is probably the case if you are wearing a dark collared suit on a hot summer day. So stop being cheap and spring $2000 for a decent light colored summer track suit. Me? I have like 20 (on each coast). I like going with a light tan Valentino two button with Lavender Shirt (and I am not talking about that Nightlife Princess Lavender either), purple Brioni pocket square, Gucci Belt and Prada loafers no socks, Sportsman Style. It is also completely acceptable to wear sport coats and Slacks to the track. Just make sure they are top-notch. Ties can work, but due to the heat, it is advisable to go no tie. The Pocket Square is the New Tie.

Turf Club

You have to gain entry into the private area of the Race Track. The Sky boxes are good but entry into the Private Turf Club is really what you want. Why? Because drinking cocktails out of plastic cups in General Population has never done any G any good. Also the girls are richer, the girls are hotter, its easier to place bets, and as Willie Sutton said,” Because that’s where the Money is”. How do you get entry? For members it’s easy. Other wise, you are going to have to be creative. (We will cover entry into private clubs and nightclubs in a future G Manifesto, for now refer to The Art of The Grease). Once you’re in, get the Matre’d on lock and the Bartenders. This will make your life easy. For me it’s real easy because these types of private clubs are like Bases of Operations for me.

Winning every Race

Once your settled in, got your table, ordered a Shrimp Cocktail or set up your Base at the bar its time to “win” some Races. Now, unless you “know” what is going to happen during the race (as I often do) you WILL lose if you bet. So the key to the track is you must pretend like your “winning” every race. Everyone likes a winner. Girls will gravitate over to you, Socialite girls will leave there boyfriends to hang out with you, the Gold Diggers and Table Hawks will start circling and you will get Biz opportunities and Biz Cards up the Kazoo. The advantage you have is most people bet and lose and when people ask them how they are doing, they say, “Losing”, or “I am getting killed!” or something along those lines (and I don’t mean Beeks either). Now when a fly girl just talked to that “losing” guy, and then comes up to you and asks how your doing, and you say “that last race worked out really well” or “that race set up perfectly, but I studied the race all morning” who do you think she is going to want to hang out with more? Also when the race is running, Yell and cheer (keep it smooth though), but don’t make mention of which horse you are pulling for. When the come down the wire, increase your cheering. As the horses approach the finish line Yell something to your Running Partner like “I told you!” And even thrown in some high-fives to make it all look authentic. You will be able to feel the eyes of girls on you from all over. Similar to marketing. Now spark up a smoke. Take a sip for an elegant high, be one hell of a guy, fly pelican fly.

Know the Ecosystem

The great part about the racetrack is you get a diverse portfolio of girls. Hollywood Actress girls love the Track. So do Model Girls. So do Gold Diggers and Table Hawks. And Rich Daughters. We will deal with how to deal with these different girls at a later date. For now refer to The Six Elements of Picking up Girls.

Do your legwork

Know the after gigs. It’s important to get multiple pitches out to girls during the track to hook up things for later. Know the resorts, the restaurant owners, who are hosting the Mansion Parties and the bartenders. Its summertime, remember, and bars tend to get busy. Every second counts, and you don’t want to waste precious time waiting for drinks. Get the waitresses on lock down also. These girls can really bail you out by putting together a private chilling area for you and a Running Partner and a couple of fly Diggers. Having a top chef come by and shake your hand and order something for you “off-menu” never made anyone look bad either. If the move gets no reaction from the girl, call her a cab to take back to her crib in the trailer park/ suburbs.

Work in Pairs

The G Manifesto usually advocates working dolo, unless you are rolling with a G Manifesto Certified Running Partner. Then it’s good to go Scarface with Manolo. The Race Track is a good place to roll with Running Partner. Girls often are in bigger groups and it’s good to have some extra muscle to deal with rival crews and Haters. And like anywhere these days, there is no lack of Haters at the Track.

“I knew it!”

In closing, here is a great custom move to use on girls at the track (and I have used this move so many times with success, I don’t mind giving it up): Spot two fly socialite girls like a Cheetah. Have your running partner roll over to them (suited down of course) and sprack up a conversation. Doesn’t really matter, could be about anything, just be charming, witty, and hold their attention. Next you “roll up” on them like sleeves, ignore the girls and say to your Running Partner “Remember we have ten Grand riding on this race” right before the announcer says “And there off!” Follow the Race and ignore the girls completely. This is very important. Become a little more animated as the horses are coming down the final stretch, remember, and don’t specify which horse or horses you are pulling for. As the horses come Thru the Wire (and I don’t mean that Kanye track with that dope Chaka Kahn sample, Through The Fire), say “I knew it!” and give your running partner a Pound. Maybe throw something else in there like “I told you….that’s three races in a row now!” Girls will already be completely sold on you. If you want to torture them, wait for them to introduce themselves. If you don’t want to punish them too much, Introduce yourself, and invite them for a drink at the bar. Ignore all questions about which horses you had or who you have on the next race, or greet there questions with your index finger up to your lips, like you would “shhhhh”. No need to make the sound. Invite them to your table at the finish line. The Rest is Up To You…………

Email of the Week in regards to Nightlife Princesses:

“I thought you got busted Mr. Portfirio, I was sick to my stomach and having panic attacks thinking you were in the clink, or are you? Anyways I have become quite the G thanks to your Manifesto’s, and when my new Razor PDF vibrated in my new Bironi Custom made suit with your latest blog in Vegas last night (all of this thanks to a heist in Scottsdale that netted me 450K and left 4 dead, but that’s neither here nor there) I quickly located the local “Vegas Nightlife Princess” at the most upscale underground night club in all of Sin City. I simply said “Jack Pot”!!!!!!!!

Needless to say I followed your tips, and had her back in my suite at 6 AM doing things to her that even a farm animal would scowl at. She limped out of my room 20 minutes ago. Thanks for the tips and tricks, keep them coming and should we ever cross path beware that you created primp up and coming mutha fucking G!!!!!”

—–Not sure about the whole farm animal thing. I don’t really know too much about farms. I stick to cities, beaches and cities on Beaches. Sounds like a decent score, too bad you had to go to Scotsdale to do it, but next time make it more clean, dead bodies can cause unnecessary Heat (and I don’t mean that crappy NightClub called Heat either). All in all, good work.—–MPM

Side Note:

Immortal Technique from Harlem, Washington Heights is probably the Rawest MC right now. Bone Chilling. You should look into it.

Side Note II:

Opening Day at the Track is the worst time to go to the track. Ask any dork when they like to go to the Track and they will say, “Opening Day!” Enough Said.

Side Note III:

When you are at The Del Mar Thoroughbred Club, do not, and I repeat, do not go to Pacific Beach afterwards. Pacific Beach is one the greatest hoaxes ever put on the straight male. The bars in Pacific Beach have more guys than gay bars. The funny thing about it all the guys that go to Pacific Beach are homophobic. But maybe it makes sense; you know what they say about homophobic people……

Side Note III:

In the most recent issue of Los Angeles Magazine in a pro-smoking article about The Tinder Box, one patron is quoted as saying “Hitler was a non-smoker and Einstein smoked a pipe….what does that tell you?” Sound familiar? Probably does, because you already read the concept in The G Manifestos earlier installment, The Smoking Gun. That’s ok, I borrow from people also.

Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA The Murder Machine
AKA The One you Got Your Game Style From
AKA You Probably know me from Your Girl
AKA The One your Girl was with When She Never Came Home
AKA The One Who Climbs up the Balcony with The Sunglasses and The Shotty
AKA The Don Juan Beside The Don
The Guide to Getting More out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com

(Want to see something in The G Manifesto? Send suggestions to thegmanifesto@yahoo.com)

Chaka Khan, Through the Fire…dope

Kanye West, Through the Wire

Entering The Dragon

“Don‘t think; feel. It‘s like a finger pointing away to the moon. Don‘t concentrate on the finger, or you will miss all the heavenly glory.”—Bruce Lee

“If I tell you I‘m good, you would probably think I‘m boasting, If I tell you I‘m no good, You know I’m lying.” —Bruce Lee

This week we are going to respond to one of the readers emails to The G Manifesto:

“I am a huge fan of the Manifesto and I think it is great. You Da Man! How do you go out every night and still stay game tight during the day? You probably have a unconventional line of work, but most of us have to go to work or school in the morning. Please help. Ken.”

Click Here for Enter the Dragon (Two-Disc Special Edition)

Great question, Ken. First off, never say “You Da Man”. To answer your question, The Key is working out. I train for nightlife. It’s really not unlike an NFL or NBA Superstar training for their season. I would be completely lying to you if I didn’t say I was in incredible shape. In fact, if they had a professional football league where everyone had to smoke two packs of cigarettes day I would be All Pro. (Although you would never catch me dead wearing a helmet, football pads and tight pants…bullet proof vest and a custom Valentino suit, yes, football pads, no). And if they had a pro-basketball league where everyone had to stay out all night 4 nights a week, I would be an All-Star. (In fact, outside of A.I., God Shammgod, and J-Will, you would be hard pressed to find anyone out there with a better handle than me….) But I will tell you this, put Any professional athletes against me for 5 straight nights of no sleep, no drugs partying, swooping girls and the beautiful evil that nighttime brings and the I can tell you it won’t be me who is the one going to have a mental and or physical breakdown. So how do I do it? You must Enter The Dragon.

Click Here for Enter the Dragon (Two-Disc Special Edition)

Here is how:

First things first, you need a place to work out. You don’t want to join the corporate gym that has all new equipment, a juice bar and all yuppie clientele. Join the gym that has boxing equipment and is hot, smells terrible with a felon clientele. That’s the gym that is going to get you into great shape. Like Gleason’s in NYC, Kronk Gym in Detroit, Freddie Roach’s Wild Card Gym in Hollywood (although it does have a pretty large white-collar population), or the now defunct Finley’s or 7^th Street Gym in Diamond City. Join a tough gym. The kind of place where it doesn’t matter if you have a lit cigarette in your mouth when you are hitting a speed bag. (That all being said I do maintain a membership at a super exclusive club in NYC, oak lockers, marble floors etc, for biz deals. Always the top or the bottom, none of that middle of the road, suburban crap…a hall mark of The G Manifesto).

Jogging

Bruce Lee always said its not so important what time of day you run, it’s only important that you do run. I begin everyday with a jog. If I am living on the beach, I will jog on the beach. Barefoot is ok also. If I am living in the city, I will jog through the city streets. It helps you feel the rhythms of the street. Bad neighborhoods are always good to jog through early morning. It really helps to clear your head and will give you the stamina you need for being a player in the nightlife arena. Plus it keeps you in tune with real estate opportunities and you can see the progress of new restaurants and clubs being built. A reconnaissance mission of sorts.

Weight Lifting

You don’t need to lift heavy weights anymore, it’s not the Eighties, and you are not trying to sack the quarterback anymore. You also don’t want to become too tight and sacrifice hand speed, flexibility and fluidity. Lift lighter weights with higher reps. Work all body parts equally for symmetry. Be careful with the Good Morning exercise….that was the one that Bruce Lee injured his back and led to his demise…

Stretching

Always balance your weightlifting with stretching. Being agile is extremely important for the G. Stretching helps you recover from nights out. No one stretches enough. “Be like water making its way through cracks. Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way round or through it. If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves. Moving, be like water. Still, be like a mirror. Respond like an echo.” –Bruce Lee

Pushups, Sit-ups, Pull-ups, Isometrics

Personally I do a thousand push-ups and sit-ups a day. I have for years. Now I typically do clap, handstand, and one-armed push-ups. Rocky Balboa style. Not really sure what Isometrics are but they sound pretty dope. Pull-ups are great exercises that are also helpful when you are doing High-Rise Socialite B and E’s. You never know when you have to scale down the outside of a building, and when you do, you will be happy that you have been doing plenty of pull-ups.

Boxing

One of the most important aspects of Entering The Dragon. You need to spar. I always try to get in a few rounds a week. I also smoke a cigarette; shoot down a double espresso or a Goose and Soda between rounds to simulate a night out on the town. Mickey Rourke used to work out the same way, and he won over a Million in the ring. Make sure you work the speed bag, Double End Bag, and the Heavy bag. Be careful with the heavy bag, you don’t have to hit it as hard as you can all the time. Personally, because I have such incredible punching power, I have to go easy on the bag as not to cause injury to my shoulders and hands. Make sure you get good equipment also; Everlast is my favorite, the height of fashion for boxing equipment. Don’t neglect jumping rope either. It really helps your footwork. I was lucky as a kid, Sugar Ray Leonard gave me a lesson of rope work, and I forgot none of it.

Martial Arts

I have respect for all styles of Martial Arts and fusions of Martial Arts (my grandfather is an early pioneer of fusing boxing and Jujitsu…I am also a big fan of fusion cuisine, even though it has become Too popular). Being a child of the Seventies, I have always had an affinity for Kung-Fu. I have had a great teacher and can trace my lineage four generations to the monks in China. So you could say I have a direct pipe line to the soul of Kung-Fu. I have to keep the style and my teachers shrouded in secrecy. Kung-Fu also helps your Chi, something I work on every day.

Fueling the Dragon

There are all kinds of crazy diets you can go on. Personally I just order whatever is the most expensive thing on the menu generally speaking. Or the most fattening. Or whatever sounds the best. It really doesn’t matter as long as a top-notch chef is throwing it together. Remember, you have to enjoy life. And don’t forget to wash it down with a bottle of Red (lately I have been drinking tons of Brunello Di Montalcino… you should look into it…) Drink Green Tea. There was a recent scientific study put out that proves that Green Tea completely negates any and all ill effects of smoking (I have doubts that there are Any ill effects of smoking). There was also a recent scientific study that proves that coffee cuts and counteracts negative effects of alcohol like, cirrhosis of the liver among others. So if you round robin Green Tea, Smokes, Double Espressos, and Vino/ Grey Goose like I do, you will maintain Perfect health. Glad they finally did these studies, however, it would have been just easier to ask me, I have known this stuff for years.

Follow these tips and you too can Enter The Dragon. How will you know when you achieved it? It’s a feeling you get. It’s a feeling you get when you feel you could kill a full grown Lion with your bare hands. I feel like that on my worst days….The Rest is Up to You……………

Click Here for Enter the Dragon (Two-Disc Special Edition)

Side Note:

Look for Fernando Vargas VS Shane Mosley to be better than the first. A win by Vargas would be good for Boxing and set up a third. Gatti- Baldomir should be straight fire. And look to see De La Hoya enter the ring with Mayweather. He is in a win-win situation. If he wins the fight, obviously he wins, goes down as one of the greatest fighters ever, and gets a monster payday. If he loses, he blows up Golden Boy Promotions, gets a monster payday, and will probably get Pretty Boy Floyd on Golden Boy, thus controlling the biggest star in the sport. Classic Checkmate.

Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA The Dragon
The Guide to Getting More out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com

(Want to see something in The G Manifesto? Send suggestions to thegmanifesto@yahoo.com)

Formula for Resort Style…..

I’ll be in the house with the guns drawn
The nine mili, fire till I am sure that them lungs gone
Trapped yourself, word second the car bomb
Detonated, The target activated the cell phone

We be in the hood putting work in daily
Meditate with the ghost till my eyes are hazy
Red jag convertible, black 380
Intentions to murder, get the cash and Im swayze

Lost in the the virgin isle
Never see a day of trial
Do away with the witness
Be it man, girl, or child

Until I’m buried in shells and where the cash be
Probably be buried in EL’s, haze and hash weed
Need more than forensics to try and catch me

—–Select lyrics from “Gunz up, Foes Down” by Team Arliss featuring Styles P (G Manifesto Certified Underground Track of the Week)

Summertime. The Kentucky Derby is the official start of summer on The G Manifesto Calendar. Being that we had the Preakness last weekend, the summer is full swing (just so you know I made a killing on both races). Summertime is one of the best seasons of the year: the weather is warm (this doesn’t really effect me too much, I am always where it is warm), the days are longer, and girls have completely severed their ties with there wack winter boyfriends. Springtime is always good for business, so you should be flush with CASH. The only issue to figure out is: what styles to bust?

Resort steez is a great style all year round (if you live in warm places), but many average schmucks live somewhere freezing in the winter (NYC, Chi, Dream City are of course, more than acceptable). Basically, the key to Resort Style is dressing like your at a High-End Resort (makes sense, right?). It doesn’t mean looking like a jerk off in some stupid cargo pants, a T-shirt, a baseball cap and some Teva sandals. By the way, sandals with straps haven’t been dope since the days of Julius Caesar, and even still, he still got schooled by Cleopatra. It’s about looking like you got some Juice. Serious Juice. Think Sosa in Scarface. But just so it’s clear for the sartorially challenged, I will break down a Formula for Resort Style. Like any beautiful skyscraper, let’s build it from the ground up…….

Shoes. Summertime is time to bust loafers. And I am not talking Topsiders. Wear something with some Sizzle. White Gucci loafers will pay for themselves many times over. Same goes for white Prada loafers, the perforated ones, hard hitting, like a “Irish” Mickey Ward left hook to the liver. These are actually hard to get, so use your connections. Crocodile loafers are also statement making. Just make sure that they were skinned when the Croc was still alive, it makes for a better shoe. Same goes for Snakeskin. Really, shoes made from any Top Predator will work. Or some brown Gucci’s with white piping. Show stopping. With Resort Stilo, you can wear a lot of lighter colors, whites, baby blues, tans, light browns. Also no socks are the move. You might get blisters sometimes, but, I have said it before and I’ll say it again: “I would rather have blisters and $550 white Prada loafers on, than no blisters and no $550 white Prada loafers on”. Many times people ask me, “why would you spend five bills plus (emphasis on “plus”) on a pair of shoes?” Dumb question. The answer is because if you do, you will have girls on the ground in the Lounge touching your shoes and loving you. When was the last time that happened to someone with $75 kicks?…. White Gucci loafers will turn a fly lesbian girl back to hetero. Trust me, I’ve done it. Also, kicking your Gucci slips with piping up and telling a girl to check them out always works. However, the more artistic move is to compliment a girl on her shoes and she will inevitably check out yours. Now she is in deep water, and all you have to do is drown her……..In closing, don’t be afraid of a top notch pair of Spectators……old school and can work wonders at the Racetrack….

Slacks. Lots of linen. Again, white is always good. With white however, you need to watch what you drink. This is the only time to ease up on the Spicy Zinfandels and Big Cabs. Drink some white; it goes well with summer day anyway. Goose and soda will not screw up your $450 Zegna slacks either. Seersucker is fresh; the boys have been wearing it down in New Orleans for who knows how long. Some shrimp Maison, crab Maison, shrimp remoulade and a seersucker suit at Galatoire’s is a perfect way to spend a hot summer day. Just think lightweight fabrics. Don’t shy away from lighter colors as well. Go a little baggier than normal as well, that way you won’t sweat on the toaster in the small of your back.

Belts. Make sure it matches your shoes…..skippy. Something with a “G” on the buckle is illmatic.

Shirts. Again Linen. Madras as well. The patch ones. A lot of Designers are going with some crazy print stuff these days. Some is dope, some not. Be your own judge. Untucked is very much ok. Especially if you are not wearing a sport coat, that way no one can see the heater. Loose and a little flowing is smooth. Sosa style. Think Cocaine Kingpin or the kind of guy who has a dozen shell companies based in the canton of Zug, Switzerland, and even if you miss the mark, you should be fine.

Sportcoats. Summertime is really the only time I wear sport coats. Windowpanes and Plaids can be more than ill. White sport coats should be in every gentleman’s closet. Cream (Cash Rules Everything Around Me) too. This is the time of year when you really can put every off balance, and go with “scorched earth tactics”. Sport coats are really good for more casual environments like Hawaii and by the pool in the afternoon for Goose and Sodas.

Suits. Suits are a must for the racetrack. Same color rules apply. Tans, All-White-Gucci’s, Greys with Vanishing pinstripes by Etro….really anything sick that’s going to make the place go wild when you step in. Two or Three button. Side vents. The main thing is you want top-notch fabrics. Here is not the place to be cheap.

Hats. No two words in fashion say as much as “Panama Hat”

And make sure you have a smoke or a Cigar in your hands at all times. Just to stay one step ahead, often times I am holding both at the same time.

Resort Style is just as much about your clothes as it is about your attitude. Resort Style is all about positive vibes. Say hello to people. Act like your on vacation. Offer to buy people drinks. Tip Big. Make moves. Go out every single night. Swoop as many dope girls as your body can handle. Summertime is heating up, so make the most of it. Don’t be kicking yourself while you’re freezing next winter about how you didn’t seize the day this summer. Don’t worry about me, I will be in Buenos Aires, Rio De Janeiro and Miami Beach, Resort Style…La vida Hermosa…The Rest is Up to You………..

Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA Top Predator
The Guide to Getting More out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com

(Want to see something in The G Manifesto? Send suggestions to thegmanifesto@yahoo.com)

Styles P & ST.Raw (Team Arliss) – Gunz Up Foes Down