The G Manifesto

Somali Pirates Get Wicked

Click Here For Somali Piracy Yearbook for 2008

Click Here For Violence at Sea: Piracy in the Age of Global Terrorism

Click Here For Dangerous Waters: Modern Piracy and Terror on the High Seas

Somali pirates seized ships from France, Britain, Germany, Taiwan and Yemen, defying world naval powers by prowling further out in the Indian Ocean to target victims.

Ransom-hunting pirates equipped with skiffs, guns and grapnels took five ships in 48 hours, the two latest on Monday targeting a British cargo ship and a Taiwanese fishing vessel.

At least 17 ships and more than 250 hostages are now in pirate hands.

Ice Cube – Wicked

“There were two more hijackings today. There is one Italian-operated British-owned ship and a Taiwanese vessel near the Seychelles,” an official involved in regional piracy monitoring told AFP on condition of anonymity.

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The Seychelles government said it received a distress call saying that a Taiwanese fishing vessel, the MV Winfar 161, and its 29 crew was hijacked in its exclusive economic zone, north of Denis island.

Transport Minister Joel Morgan said military forces had been deployed to intercept the pirates, amid reports that three more Taiwanese ships were trying to escape capture.

The information centre of the European Union’s anti-piracy naval mission Atalanta confirmed the hijacking of the British Panama-flagged Malaspina Castle.

“A 32,000 tonne UK-owned and Italian-operated bulk carrier was hijacked early this morning in the Gulf of Aden … the mixed nationality crew are believed to be safe,” it said.

Click Here For Somali Piracy Yearbook for 2008

Click Here For Violence at Sea: Piracy in the Age of Global Terrorism

Click Here For Dangerous Waters: Modern Piracy and Terror on the High Seas

The maritime administration in Sofia said 16 crew members were Bulgarians.

“We are in the middle of the risk zone for piracy, however nothing to report,” it said.

An earlier post said: “The danger exists, and it has undoubtedly grown in recent months, but the ocean is vast. The pirates must not ruin our dream.”

Hundreds of ransom-hunting Somali pirates have hijacked dozens of ships over the past year, mostly merchant vessels plying one of the world’s busiest maritime trade routes.

They operate from skiffs towed by pirate “mother ships”, which are often hijacked fishing vessels. Last year, their haul included a Ukrainian cargo loaded with combat tanks and a Saudi supertanker.

More than 130 attacks, including close to 50 successful hijackings, were reported in 2008, threatening the vital shipping lane and spurring the international community into joint naval action.

The number of attacks had dipped since the start of the year, owing to an increased international naval presence and unfavourable seas.

But some pirate groups have ventured far into the Indian Ocean, southeast of Somalia, to target ships further out at sea.

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Somaili Pirates. Making it happen.

“Lookin for the one that did it
but like En Vogue, no you’re never gonna get it”

I am really contemplating investing in the Somali Pirates. For like a 10,000% return.

– Ice Cube

Click Here For Somali Piracy Yearbook for 2008

Click Here For Violence at Sea: Piracy in the Age of Global Terrorism

Click Here For Dangerous Waters: Modern Piracy and Terror on the High Seas

The Rest is Up to You…

Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA GFK, Jr.
AKA The Sly, Slick and the Wicked
AKA The Voodoo Child
The Guide to Getting More out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com

Papoose – Russian Roulette

Which of Course Samples:

“DIRTY DIANA” by MICHAEL JACKSON

A Typical Tuesday Night in Southern California

“California’s like a beautiful, wild girl on heroin …Who’s high as a kite, thinkin’ she’s on top of the world, not knowing she’s dying even if you show her the marks.”

– The Motorcycle Boy, Rumble Fish

Its 9:30 pm when I roll Dolo in the Southern California “party sushi” joint like the Fly Girl Racker, Bean Stacker, Zippo Clacker, friendly neighborhood International Playboy you know and love.

The Scene breaks down as it usually does:

Multiple tables of Girls with fake boobs partying for “Jenny’s”, “Sara’s” or whoever’s birthday, a few weesh guys in Ed Hardy shirts, I’m guessing a few “Reality Stars” from their hollow, insecure posturing, and some hipster cats in fedoras. Maybe a few actors. Who cares, I am sure their movies are wack.

Not bad, since Me against this type of competition is like Obama going against Hillary.

Especially, considering that I didn’t leave anything to chance and I am dressed Sharper than Health Care:

My President is Black and so is my one button Gucci bespoke suit with peaked lapels and Cookie Monster blue interior. My shirt and Brioni pocket square are Baby Blue as if my name was Gerber, and I am not talking about Rande either.

My Bontoni loafers: c’est si bon and my E. Marinella tie: magnifique, and of course, I have the Brushed Chrome Desert Eagle for any sashimi style Kobe Beef.

Pockets: Greener than “energy tech” and Bankroll: thicker than Azerbaijan “daisy-chained” spot crude oil.

My Game: sicker than Hong Kong Chicken Flu and I got The John the Conqueroo.

I am by eons the dopest, sharpest dressed, most brutally handsome cat in the spot, but Hollywood has never come up with a movie star that is half-IRA, half-ETA so the girls in the party sushi joint have no frame of reference for me.

I then exchange glances with the target: A Orange County fake boobs blonde wearing a dress from South Coast Plaza and shoes from Fred Segal no doubt. Her boobs are Faker than the Horsehead that Tom Hagen puts in that bed.

She is not some fly Estonian Model Girl or the daughter of Hungary’s richest businessman, but sometimes you have to work with what the Nightlife Gods have given you.

I then float, like a Mardi Gras parade, to her table of three of her girlfriends, drinking sake, and get ready to sting like a Mayweather Jab (Roger or Floyd Jr., doesn’t matter which one). Two of the other girls look identical to her, the fourth: weesh. I pull up a chair holding a far superior bottle of Nigori.

I then introduce myself as the DJ is spinning some wack crap that every single other person in the joint is loving. (Doesn’t anyone have Special Ed’s “I Got it Made” on wax anymore?)

Special Ed – I Got It Made

I then wave to the DJ (who I have carefully cultivated a “functional” acquaintance with over the last few months) who gives me a “finger point” and a smile back.

Instead of “Defeating this DJ”, I have “locked down” this DJ simply for him to give me high-fives and finger points so I don’t seem “weird” to girls when I roll in the sushi joint Dolo to pick up girls.

I then yap to the girls about how the live lobster sashimi is the best thing on the menu, which, of course, they have never tried. When I describe it, one of them says it sounds “gross” as different waitresses say hello to me and I get a few “finger points” from the sushi chefs.

The Girls tell me they come here for “the california rolls”. Another one of the girls tells me that she loves “the rice”.

I roll my eyes, but I have been through this literally a million times before so I keep calm and don’t start ridiculing the girls or stab myself in the eye with a chopstick.

They then ask me how I know the DJ and I yap about how I have known him forever and blah blah blah. Topics fire back and forth at a rapid fire pace as we down the bottle of Nigori.

The Girls tell me The Hard Rock in Las Vegas is their favorite place to travel. I tell them The Hard Rock is wack. They ask me where I would love to vacation next and I say “Seychelles or Mauritius” and they look at me like I am speaking a foreign language. I ask them if they have been to France, and they said they haven’t but they heard people are “rude” there. When the girls ask what I do for fun, I am tempted to tell them I have been experimenting with Voodoo to help me swoop even more girls than I already do and to destroy my rivals, but thankfully the owner comes by to shake my hand.

Junior Wells – The Hoodoo Man (1966)

The owner then gives me another bottle of Nigori (pro-bono) and the girls ask me how I have known him and I lie, “we go back a long time” as I think the owner is weesh, and barely know him, but I remain friendly with him for situations such as these.

The girls now think I am the coolest thing they have ever met.

But then again, I have paid the cost to be the Boss, so it shouldn’t be a shocker that they are loving me like Ugg Boots and Mac Gloss.

Styles P- The Key

After polishing off the Nigori, I invite the girls to another nightclub where I know the owners to get in “libre”.

On the way to the club (located a few blocks from my crib, coincidentally or is it strategically?) I light up a smoke with a dope “reverse” Zippo Clack, that, I invented when I was 12 years old. None of the girls notice how dope I light the cigarette but one of the girls says she “hates smoking”. “Smoking is so gross…and so unhealthy”, says the most out of shape and unhealthy member of the girl crew.

I ignore both of them, and keep “Pied Pipering” the girls. The main “Orange County blonde fake boobs girl wearing a dress from South Coast Plaza” says she “loves smoking when she drinks” and takes a drag off my cancer stick. I notice she doesn’t inhale.

Almost to the club, I spark up a another smoke with a snap of my Zippo and interrupt the yapping from the girls by saying “Hey!” so they pay attention to the dope “snap light move”, but it gets zero reaction.

We skip the line like an old Run-D.M.C. record and enter Le Club.

I spend the next hour with more mind-numbing conversation, winning over the group, and deflecting “SliverBack Style” some beta male Ex-Mortgage Brokers in I am guessing, Christian Audigier shirts (One beta-ex-mortgage guy I make scamper off simply by saying, “Did you know there are free Red Bull and Vodkas at the back bar?”).

I then invite the “Orange County blonde fake boobs girl wearing a dress from South Coast Plaza” girl back to my crib for Champagne. (Really just a $9 bottle of Processco, but she can’t tell the difference).

After swooping her till 3:30 am, getting more two lips than a florist* and shimmying her out the door to her cab, I can only wonder:

Was this night worth it?

Probably not.

Even International Playboys win some and lose some.

But most likely, I will do it again next Tuesday.

The Rest is Up to You…

Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA GFK, Jr.
AKA The Sly, Slick and the Wicked
AKA The Voodoo Child
The Guide to Getting More out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com

*In case you are stuck. Blower = Two lips = Tulips. Get it?

Chaka Khan- Stay (illest intro ever)

Stay – Rufus Featuring Chaka Khan

Styles P – The Key of course samples this:

Spandau Ballet – Nature of The Beast

Nature Of The Beast – Spandau Ballet

Best South Beach Miami Hotel Pools

Click Here for Fool’s Paradise: Players, Poseurs, and the Culture of Excess in South Beach by Steven Gaines

Click Here to Buy Cocaine Cowboys

Click Here for The South Beach War Report Part I: The Basics

1. Delano – Getting past security may be harder than scoring a table at Casa Tua on a Saturday night, but it’s well worth it. If waving to a pretend friend on the other side of the velvet rope fails, head to the bar; chances are, spenders will be welcomed. Plan your wardrobe around lounging; no one comes here for dipping.

2. The Shore Club – More modern than tropical, getting into this pool is fairly simple. No special trickery required. Put away your camera; shooting celebrities will get you kicked out.

3. The Setai – Access to this sought-after pool is doable from the outdoor restaurant by the boardwalk. Favorite among the Parisians and hip-hop moguls, Setai is “ze bomb.”

4. Mondrian Miami – Either the management is desperate or lost or both, but getting in is as easy as spotting fake boobage. Mondrian faces the bay, so be ready for jetskiers and their tranquil ways.

5. Flamingo – Technically not a hotel, but with the well-documented shenanigans, who know who pays for what at this notorious residential building. Pool area hosts frequent weekend parties rivaling the beach clubs.

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Not a bad list actually. Agreed on Delano #1. I have swooped too many fly girls there to disagree.

My personal #2 is thankfully not on the list, which will help keep it Tranquillo.

I am not going to say it either (as of now), in an effort to keep it Tranquillo.

Click Here for Fool’s Paradise: Players, Poseurs, and the Culture of Excess in South Beach by Steven Gaines

Click Here to Buy Cocaine Cowboys

Click Here for The South Beach War Report Part I: The Basics

The Rest is Up to You…

Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA GFK, Jr.
The Guide to Getting More out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com

2 Live crew – Mama Juanita

Belfast: Cars Burned, Roads Blocked

Click Here for The IRA

Click Here for Making Sense of the Troubles: The Story of the Conflict in Northern Ireland

Suspected IRA dissidents and their supporters hijacked cars Monday in working-class Catholic areas of Northern Ireland in a coordinated effort to block roads and threaten police stations, police said.

The Police Service of Northern Ireland said it was receiving a wave of reports of vehicles being hijacked by masked gunmen in several parts of Belfast and in the Kilwilkie district of Lurgan, a power base for Irish Republican Army dissidents southwest of Belfast.

Click Here for The IRA

Click Here for Making Sense of the Troubles: The Story of the Conflict in Northern Ireland

Some vehicles were being set on fire in roads to disrupt traffic at rush hour, while others were abandoned near four Belfast police stations and on Northern Ireland’s major motorway near Lurgan.

Police said they were treating all the abandoned vehicles as potential car bombs, although they cautioned this was unlikely. They urged motorists to avoid Kilwilkie and parts of Catholic west Belfast entirely.

Monday’s upheaval came at the end of a month in which IRA dissidents shot to death two soldiers and a policeman — the first killings of British security forces since 1998, the year of Northern Ireland’s peace accord.

Police said at least two cars were hijacked in Lurgan’s Kilwilkie district, the power base of suspected IRA dissident Colin Duffy. Duffy, 41, was charged last week with murdering the two soldiers.

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Click Here for The IRA

Click Here for Making Sense of the Troubles: The Story of the Conflict in Northern Ireland

Ireland, keep the peace.

The Rest is Up to You…

Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA GFK, Jr.
The Guide to Getting More out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com

Peace in Northern Ireland

Mexico’s Drug Cartels Splintering

Click Here for The G Manifesto’s The Tijuana Report: There is a War going on Outside

Click Here for Cocaine Trafficking in Latin America

Click Here for Narcocorrido: A Journey into the Music of Drugs, Guns, and Guerrillas

Click Here for Drug Lord: The Life & Death of a Mexican Kingpin

On Tuesday, the Obama administration announced plans to deploy more agents and equipment along the border with Mexico to tackle the increase in drug-trafficking and related violence.

The BBC’s Stephen Gibbs in Mexico City says that with some evidence that drug violence is crossing the border, both governments have been are under pressure to find a more co-ordinated policy to undermine the immensely powerful Mexican cartels.

The drug gangs have splintered into six main cartels, under pressure from law enforcement action on both sides of the border, according to the attorney general’s office in Mexico.

For example, one gang once affiliated with the Sinaloa group under the Pacific cartel alliance was now listed as its own cartel the Beltran Leyva organisation.

Another gang, La Familia, which operates in central Mexico and was previously believed to answered to the Gulf cartel, is now listed as a separate group.

Among the men on the most-wanted list are the alleged head of the powerful Sinaloa cartel, Joaquin “El Chapo” or Shorty Guzman, who gained recent additional notoriety after being named by Forbes magazine as one of the world’s billionaires.

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Click Here for The G Manifesto’s The Tijuana Report: There is a War going on Outside

Click Here for Cocaine Trafficking in Latin America

Click Here for Narcocorrido: A Journey into the Music of Drugs, Guns, and Guerrillas

Click Here for Drug Lord: The Life & Death of a Mexican Kingpin

The Rest is Up to You…

Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA GFK, Jr.
The Guide to Getting More out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com

Flex Ft Mr Saik – Dime Si Tu Te Vas Con El