People are always coming up to me on Los Calles y Las Avenidas of the world and asking me, “Yo, Michael, how do you get to a new city in summertime and within a month you are the #1 Ranked player in the whole city?”
Great question.
It comes down to Preparation and Practice.
Here was my Summertime Preparation formula:
1. Yoga. I hit up the Yoga Steez heavy in preparation for summer. This got my body back in order for the brutal lifestyle of an International Playboy. Read these data sheets on the subject:
3. Language Lessons. I got a French tutor and hit up the French heavy. Real cute and sweet girl too. I kept it professional in case you are wondering. Language Lessons.
4. Massage. Ever since I injured my back when I lost my passport in Spain, I have had a beautiful blonde Russian girl come to my crib once a week for a massage. No therapeutic release in case you are wondering.
I did try to keep this one professional for as long as I could. I swear.
This is the kind of preparation you need to do for Summertime Success.
A lot of people that are planning a trip to Colombia ask me, “How do you prepare for a trip to Colombia?”
Great question.
Here is my four point plan:
Salsa
If you want to really handicap yourself from swooping fly Colombianas: don’t learn how to dance. You might as well not speak other languages, don’t smoke cigarettes, stop smiling, stop telling jokes and don’t wear Custom Suits as far as I am concerned. I honestly can’t think of any Colombiana (or any girl for that matter) that I have swooped where dancing didn’t play a big role. Re-read this: The Salsa Swoop Move to brush up.
Boxing
It’s no secret that I am a huge advocate of the sweet science. Although Colombia doesn’t have the aggressive locals of say, Latvia; it is always good to be able to throw a punch when the situation calls for it (always as a last resort). Get your rounds in.
As a side benefit, once you get to Colombia, you can look up the best gym, get some sparring in and get to know some of the local G’s.
Surfing
I always like to get some sessions in when I am in California and Baja Norte. Almost all my best friends surf, so it is a good way to keep in touch with what is going down. Good exercise as well. And sometimes you just need to bust some tail slides and air it out.
Spanish
Maybe the most important thing you can do in Colombian trip preparation is get your language Game tight. Read here for Language Lessons. And make sure you read books and watch some dope movies as well in Spanish. Many a “phony player” has imploded in Colombia without the proper Language Game. Don’t be one of them.
In other news, a Hedge Fund cat explains Why Do Smart Men Date Dumb Girls?:
Dating a less successful woman isn’t about wanting women to be dumb. It’s about wanting someone who prioritizes their life in a way that’s compatible with how you prioritize yours. I love my job, but I work all the fucking time. If I date an equally driven woman, we’re both working 18 hours days, when do we even have time to see each other? We don’t. I date a kindergarten teacher who works—f**k, I have no idea how many hours kindergarten teachers work. How many hours do you work? Really? Sh*t. Well, you’re a really driven person and you love work. But the theoretical Kindergarten teacher, she has a more flexible schedule, she’ll be able accommodate me, it’s going to be easier. Just on a literal level, it’s easier. Why don’t women do this too? Every alpha woman I know wants to be with a man who is as successful as her or more so. And coordinating that stuff is almost impossible. Why don’t they just date some beta male who works in a bookstore and will make dinner for them every night? Doesn’t every successful person—man or woman—see how that’s easier?
